We so often talk about things being free to acess or free to do. And often these "freebies" are viewed as cheap or we forget, or don't realize, who has or is paying for them and that there are rules surrounding everything, including those things that are called free. When something is free to us, it is because someone else has paid for it. When we are said to be free to do something, or say something, there are always rules attached to this freedom, even when those rules are unspoken rules. And so therefore, what is free is not cheap.
In the free world, where we are blessed with political and religious liberties, we often love to say, "This is a free country and we can do what we want, go where we want to go and say what we want to say, as long as no one else gets hurt." Yes. As my late stepdad would say, "I think we have too much freedom. that may be our trouble in this society." Could he have had a point?" Yes, I think so! The fact is, in many free societites we are free to do things that are legal but not necessarily moral or helpful; such things are said to not "hurt people" and are supposed to be "no one's business." There is the matter of marital infidelity, having "love affairs" and romantic relationships outside of one's marriage. For many years, far too many popular songs have "celebrated" the "joys of forbidden fruit" and have lamented the "oppressiveness" of society's unspoken rules, and God's Law, that denounce such behavior and say that it is wrong. I have seen, over and over, the stark consequences for people who take such liberties with their marriages; and taking such liberties contributes to so many missing/murdered adults! Marital unfaithfulness will hurt the partners deeply and shatter all trut and respect, even when they may try to still save their marriage. It is very wrong for popular music and other media to condone, much less celebrate, behavior that causes so much "hidden damage." Then there is abortion, which has been legal for years and is often considered a right where "no one will get hurt." Really? Even if we don't factor in the obvious, what it does to the baby in utero, what about the others in that victim's life? Even when the girls and women who have had abortions suppress/repress their abortions, they are forces to suffer in silence because society does not count the loss of a child by abortion as a loss, but as a "choice." These girls and women are forbidden to grieve and to work through their traumas, except by maligned "prolife pregnancy resource centers." Then there are the possible physical side effects of abortions, which include the risks of not being able to conceive wanted future children, miscarriages, disrupted menstrual cycles, and worse. Birth dads who learn about having fathered babies that were aborted without their consent, often feel intensely betrayed and violated. Society is cheated of the future contributions of a person who was not allowed to live. I did not mention the obvious harm that it does to the unborn because that is another discussion which could fill a book; I want to show how even socially acceptable things are not always best or helpful to any of us.
This freedom of choice, the freedom to choose which so often has become too much freedom, come with the responsibilities to choose what is right, what is best and what is helpful. Freedom is not license. And the only reason we have these freedoms, even to excess, is because many others have paid for them. We are aware of this and that is why this Memorial Day weekend has been set aside to focus on and remember this: That it is past and present military veterans and active troops, who have paid for these freedoms, and often with their lives, whether in their wars or "at home." As one post I saw the other day put it, "Some gave all, but all gave some."
As far as freedom of choice goes, there is the matter of free speech. But how free is free speech and how free should it be? Does it mean the freedom to influence or engage our governments to act on our behalf, as I am doing in my current petition drive? Does free speech mean saying controversial or even offensive things (as I'm doing in using the word abortion)? Does it mean saying anything we want to say? I think most of us believe that freedom of speech should stop where the rights and feelings of other start. Verbal abuse, whether online or in person, is crossing the line that goes beyond free speech. I have already written a post on this topic of free speech but I have experienced incidents since then, which apply to this. In the earliest stages of my petition campaign, I have have sought the support of a person whose has two autism-centered blogspots, and whom I have supported. I contacted this person by email and Facebook but never received any reply. Discouraged by the slow growth in gathering signatues for my petition and craving outside support, I posted multiple appeals, over the following days, for others to contact this person concerning my petition and I included the person's two published email addresses. This backfired! Apparently some other person mentioned my posts when contacting this person. This person finally relied to my email appealing to her for support, without any response to my appeal; this person clearly was angry with me, demanding that I promptly delete all my appeals to others to contact her or be reported. I tried to follow orders but this person kept sending angry emails until she was satisfied that I had everything removed. This person has disabled me from contacting her and has told me, "I do not want to hear from you again." In this person's eyes, I had definitely crossed the line that went beyond freedom of speech, harassing her and violating her privacy (even though her email addresses are published). So even if we take liberties to do what we think are okay but others do not see it as okay, as was the case with this person, our words will have consequences. In this case, I made an enemy. Much earlier, when I was new to Facebook, I took liberties to post about two missing children and posted their information and flyers on another user's Facebook Wall. This user promptly sent me a message, telling me that she was displeased with my violation of her privacy and the "imposing of my agenda and my cases" on her. We kept sending each other angry messages back and forth that were defensive; by the end of the day I found that this user had blocked me totally where I could not contact her at all. In this person's eyes, I had gone far from freedom of speech to harassment and invasion of her privacy. My online posts on her page had consequences, that of making an enemy. Even when we exercise freedom of speech, others often will see it as something else and they may, as in my case, react against us. Nothing is totally free.
And this freedom of speech, which is the foundation of all our political and religious freedoms, is only free to us because others have paid for it. That is, past and present veterans and active military troops, have paid for all of this, often with their lives. And this freedom of speech comes with responsibilities, meaning what is free is not cheap. So let us use Memorial Day to not only commemorate our heroes but also to think about what freedom really is, that it comes with responsibilities, that its abuse can have serious consequences and that it is not free.
