How About Empathy for Autism?

     I'm sure that by now, virtually all of us have hear about the recent, horrific Aurora, Colorado shooting that where a 24-young man proceeded to shoot over 70 people, and 12 of thse people, including a six-year-old girl, were killed. The lives of many, many people will never be the same and the losses that they have suffered will say with them for the rest of their lives. And this shooter was said to be a loner, though, according to recent reports, his classmates in high school don't remember him to be like that. This gunman was talented, bright, had much potential and a good furture ahead of him? Wht would he throw it all away? His motive has never been made clear.
     In the wake of this mass murder, I only learned about the outrage in the autism community secondhand, when I saw a post where the person who posted the article commented on it: "This makes my blood boil." The very headline of the article stated that a Joe Scarborough, of MSNBC's "Morning Joe," had made a comment where he says that the gunman "might have been on the autism scale." Now, before this, I was unfamilar with the name of this journalist as I don't follow "Morning Joe." If I had heard the comment with my own ears, I may have had more of a reaction to it. And then, seemingly within hours, a petition on Change.org had been started and it already had twice as many signatures as mine, though it was new! And, within days, a person posted this: "Wow! This petition already has over 10,000 signatures!" Frankly, I was more annoyed than anything, that Scarborough had made an ill-advised remark that caused support for my own petition to slip as some who were actvely promoting my petition were promoting this new petition, which angrily called for Joe Scarborough to make a "genuine apology" to the autism community and to "retract his statement." I ended up signing it and I had left him a link to my petition, also tweeting it to him, "Please sign my petition to support the autism community."
     As it is, in my newsfeed one day, I saw a link to the petition letter for the petition to Scarborough which had taken the autism community by storm and distracted people in that community from actively promoting my petition. In her letter to Scarborough, the petition creator, who is highly esteemed and valued in the autism community and whose blogspot has won an award for one of the top "autism blogs" of all time, wrote an eloquent letter to him. However, some things in her letter and much of the outrage over Scarbough's remark, seem to miss the point. She made a statement that the gunman had never even been diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder (ASD). This irked me; there are many undiagnosed people with ASDs. Also, she stated that no person who has been diagnosed with an ASD has been convicted of violent crime, which I know to be very untrue. I had read a Huffington post article which contained Scarborough's comment and his later attempt at an apology that was seen as a poor attempt at apologizing, a "nonapology." Actually, I had learned, which I never knew before, that Scarborough has a son with Asperger's Syndrome who he is proud of. You read the article for yourself: http://huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/23/joe-scarborough-james-holmes-autism_n_1694599.html.
     Actually, Scarborough had meant to say that people who feel and are marginalized are more vulnerable to feeling and even acting on the anger and desperation that can drive some to commit such heinous crimes. And many people with autism DO feel and are marginalized. But most do not turn to murder to solve their problems; most will cope in their own ways, even "faking it" or withdrawing from others, but most do not turn to mass murder. The crimes that people with ASDs tend to be convicted of, because of poor social skills and anger at a society that has not welcomed them, are stalking, sex crimes and assault. I have read of a few people with ASDs who have been convicted of murder, but not many. Yes, I wish that Scarborough had not said what he did; he definitely had put his foot in his mouth, especially being the father of a child with an ASD! The remark was uncalled-for as there is not a scintilla of evidence that the gunman was even suspected of having an ASD, much less having the official diagnosis.
     I don't understand why an "empathy deficit," a fancy way of saying that one of the features of an ASD is a reduced ability to empathize with others, is one of the criteria for an official diagnosis or is one of the questions that I had to answer just to determine of I "may have an ASD." For my experience tells me that it is NOT the possession of empathy that is a problem with having an ASD, but expressing it in appropriately. And why all the questions about whether people with autism have empathy or not? Let's flip it over; what about nonautistic people having empathy for the experience of autism? We all know that many people off the spectrum are challenged in the empathy department, but no one EVER says, " Nonautistic people have an empathy deficit." But people tend to say this about those with ASDs.
     What about empathy for autism? What about the many who live with ASDs that we are not even able to get a proper diagnosis for, because we cannot find a qualified, affordable professional who will check us out for this? And what about empathizing with our feelings of shame, guilt, confusion, disconnection, and always wondering what is REALLY wrong with us? What about empathizing with those young people who may have made great gains in early childhood intervention, yet when they age out of their school systems and out of services entitlements, they find that they must give up any dreams they have to work at careers they would love or businnesses they would like to start, because they still need support and accommodations but these are not there for them? What about empathy for those adults with ASDs who have a history of one failed relationship after another, not only because of their own poor social skills but because people refuse to accept quirks or differences? What about empathizing with those who "come out," even with employers, about their ASDs and who find the door of acceptance slammed in their faces because people still will not bother to educate themselves about ASDs? What about empathizing for all those children with ASDs who are more vulnerable to being bullied because their differences mark them out as easy targets? What about empathy for those with ASDs who encounter uninformed law enforcement officials and who find themselves on the wrong side of the law because they "look suspicious"? What about empathizing with all those children in minority communities whose undiagnosed ASDs will keep them from having appropriate educations or good futures? What about empathizing with those who feel so trapped and overwhelmed by caring for their loved one with an ASD, that they resort to murder because they see no other options and have no support? What about their loved ones?
     All this underscores the need that adults with autism have for support services and that is why I have created my petition. Yes, funds for more autism research and funds for better training for professionals, like doctors and counselors, would need to be part of this and are included in my petition letter to my petition targets. These support services would empower people with ASDs to reach their potentials, to contribute to society and to pay taxes. Indirectly, the support services can reduce crime, poverty, unemployment and homelessness caused by many having unmet needs. It can even save lives and rescue parents or caregivers from resorting to the unthinkable because they see no other way out! So, if you have not signed the petition, what are you waiting for? And even if you are not in the US, you can still pass it on.

My petition can be signed at: http://tiny.cc/mrsahw
To share my petition with even those who are not on social networks, please share the petition widget at my website (under construction): http://caringenoughtomakeadifference.com.
To fing and easily share my petition on Facebook, please go here: https://www.facebook.com/?ref=tn_tnmn#!/ChildrenWithAutismBecomeAdultsWithAutism