What Does America Need?

Constantly, we are hearing what America needs.

Many, seeing the terrorism that threatens us, are calling for a "war on terrorism" and that if we "reform immigration," we can keep ourselves safe.

One political party insists that we need tolerance, racial reconciliation, brotherhood, peace, and equal rights for all.

One political party insists that we need personal responsibility, reduced taxes, independence and intact liberties.

One powerful lobby is demanding the right to reproductive freedom in the name of equal health care for a certain gender.

One powerful lobby is calling for the right to marriage equality and tolerance.

An active voting bloc is calling for the right to life for all, prayer in the public schools, and the preservation of traditional marriage.

One strong lobby, often because of tragic personal tragedy, are calling for the strict control of guns to protect America.

A centuries long oppressed race of people are calling for justice and equality for themselves.

I can go on and on and on. Everyone has ideas what America needs. So many people believe that they have it down what is wrong with us and what is needed to fix the problem. Can all these people be right? Or do the points each party seek to make have some truth in them? Or are we all turning a blind eye to what America really needs? Or are we content with the way things are?

Peer Pressure & Culture

We often talk about peer pressure as it applies to children and especially teens. I daresay that peer pressure never goes away and we all remain vulnerable to it, no matter what our age. This has much to do with all the ads that hit us constantly, whether via television, newspaper, radio or the Internet, giving us the constant message that what we need is "personal happiness" and that this "happiness" can be found through material things, get rich quick schemes, "magic" products promising to make us thin, lose weight without effort, give us a well-behaved child without loving discipline, "cure" neurological conditions like Asperger's Syndrome or Autism, or to re-capture our youth or halt the aging process. I find myself getting mad at these ads, especially those pop up ads that interrupt my reading when I surf the Internet and make unwanted sales pitches about their products that supposedly will make me "happy" or give me a "better life." Many months ago, someone pitches a product claiming that purchasing it would "cure" the addictions of our loved ones. Really?

Our American President's Vision

In the US, we are as deeply divided as I remember us ever being. We are deeply divided on what America needs to "be taken in the right direction." Is this why our current President is so divisive and we are raking him over the coals with our constant criticism of everything he does, good or bad? I remember when, under President Obama's watch, Osama bin Laden was put to death. I remember when the news was delivered on television. I also remember snarky comments such as, "This President did nothing to put bin Laden to death; those brace Navy Seal soldiers did! Don't give this President any credit!" I'm not disputing that it was the actions of the military that carried out the sentence of bin Laden, but apart from the President's orders I don't believe could have carried this act out. Our President is famous for his promise to bring "change" to America. What we think about this "change" he has been bringing to America depends on what we think America needs.

Republicans, Democrats & What America Needs

My feelings about his "change"? I would be lying if I said that I support the President's policies concerning "abortion on demand" for, at one time, we all developed for some nine months inside our moms. Marriage equality? With Jesus' words on marriage designed by God to be between male and female and with Bible verses telling us that same sex lifestyles are, in God's eyes, as wrong as any other sin, I cannot support "marriage equality either. I do support other policies put fort by this President, such as the ABLE Act, that will let people with disabilities be able to keep their benefits even if they set up special needs trusts. I support his call to raise the federal minimum wage to make it easier for the "working poor" to support their families. I wish that I, as a Christian, did not have to choose between two issues that God has spoken clearly on (the sanctity of human life and marriage) and other issues He has spoken on (poverty, justice for the working classes, caring for the vulnerable and race relations). But with this two-party system, we are not given much choice and are forced to choose one vision over another, though both visions speak on matters on which God speaks.

Where is America Headed?

I know that some Pastors and Christian leaders now believe and declare that America is under the judgment of God or at least is in danger of that. I can only say that with our current loss, more and more, of a moral compass, we may be losing our way as a country. Our children and teens have never been so violent or so vicious. Months ago, two 12 year old girls had viciously stabbed one of their friends of the same age. This girl miraculously survived and was surrounded by international support as her story was made public. But her two friends may, if charged as adults, face the rest of their lives behind bars. They reportedly spent months planning this act and wanted to see what it was like to commit a murder. A few years ago, in my own home state of Missouri, a nine year old girl had gone missing one day. Days later, she was found deceased and her murderer was a fourteen year old girl, not a grown man or even a boy. On television, programs show videos of violent bullying of young people by other young people. We now have what is called a "rape culture" and one college student has been said to boast: "I would rape women if I knew that I would get by with it." Months ago, a "how to guide" was published telling child rapists how to satisfy their pedophile urges. We know of one organization, NAMBLA, set up for males who have an attraction for boys. Have we lost our minds? By our actions, we are saying that we value not the freedom of religion but freedom from religion.

I'm sure that as I write this, most of you are aware of that account of the barbaric burning of the pilot in the country of Jordan, which was caught on camera with this man in a cage (unconfirmed). And two Japanese hostages were beheaded this past week. War is being declared on us.

Well, What Does America Need?

As I read my Bible, I see little that suggests that efforts to reform this country, or any other, will do much to solve our society's ills, moral problems or social-economic injustices. Legislation can do some things to restrain hard-hearted people and to keep them in check, so civilization does not stop. I suggest that we get back to reading the Bible to discover what God says what we need, what He has gone to great lengths to provide us, and what we need to do to be part of the solution to what ails us. Jesus said that He was going to come "like a thief in the night" and at an unexpected time. Are you ready for Him?

What Breeds Crime, Including Heinous Crimes?

It has happened again. Another mass shooting has occurred. This time, the scenes of the crime include an apartment, a delicatessen and a university. The shooter killed five people, injured over a dozen others and then apparently killed himself. He has altered the lives of many people. Once more, the finger-pointing has begun. We are talking about guns and about mental health. You know that those two loaded issues are normally taboo until something like this happens. One more thing is true. The mass shooter apparently was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome and was called "high-functioning." Will this ever end?

Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASDs) & the Question of Criminal Tendencies

The current debate includes guns and mental health. Of course, these are hot button issues and remain controversial. If you followed the news of the current mass murders, you may have heard the heart-wrenching media address of one of the grieving fathers. If you did, you will have heard his impassioned plea to all parents not to assume that something tragic could not strike our children. You also heard his lashing out at our "craven politicians who refuse to address gun rights and the NRA." Actually, according to police, the gun owner had passed background checks when he registered for his three guns. He legally acquired all three of them in his name. This was the case though his family was aware that he was "seriously mentally disturbed" and so were police. It was not until this past Sunday, however, that I discovered, in an article, that this young man apparently was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. A sponsored post by an Asperger's expert confirms that he was diagnosed but other advocates say that an ASD was suspected, not diagnosed. Just earlier this week, I had come upon an article that details current studies of mass killers. The writer of that article tells us that over 30 percent of mass killers are diagnosed with some variant of an autism spectrum disorder (ASD) or other developmental disabilities. Months ago, the mother of Temple Grandin, who is considered the "highest-functioning" autistic person in the world, came out with a very controversial article. In the article, Temple's mom opened her article with the story of an autistic man who turned in his computer for repairs. The repairer, seeing child pornography on this man's hard drive, reported the man to the police. The rest of the article analyzes how autistic men would have the motive to view child porn, and it came in for much flack from the autism community. Years ago, when another mass shooter's information came out, it was confirmed that he was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome. But, in every such case where a mass shooter had such a diagnosis, he also had serious mental health issues, diagnosed or suspected. Even the media were careful to point that out, no doubt after pressure from the autism community. After all, there is enough of a stigma in the autism diagnosis; why add to it?

Does Autism Breed Criminal Tendencies?

Let me clarify exactly what Autism Spectrum Disorders (ASDs) are. I know that most, including those who are new to the autism community, need education. Autism is not a mental health condition, though psychiatrists can diagnose it. It is a neuro-developmental condition. ASDs, as such a condition, include Asperger's Syndrome, Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS), and Classic Autism (with varying levels of function). Autism is a complex disorder. Even the articles that speculate that it increases criminal tendencies concede that when autistic people get involved in serious crimes, it is rarely premeditated on their part. That was noted in the the article by Temple's mom and by other writers. Still, it is far less often noted that autistic people, as well as people with other developmental disabilities, are much more likely to become victims of serious crimes than to perpetrate them against others. Too often, I hear of how many in the prison system have "low IQ's" and various developmental disabilities. But, given that avoiding prosecution and prison are so often matters of having the shrewdness to avoid getting caught or, when caught, being able to afford the best attorneys, let me say this. Those incarcerated people with developmental disabilities are typically not able to "cover their tracks" in their crimes and statistically can't afford "dream teams" to get them out of trouble. So it makes sense that they seem to be over-represented in the prison population, just as, for the same reasons, non-Whites are over-represented there. The overwhelming majority of people with autism or other developmental disabilities will never commit crimes and are law-abiding citizens. The stigma of these disabilities is bad enough without adding to it the notion that autism and other developmental disabilities somehow aggravates criminality. Autism Spectrum Disorders are not enough to explain the profile of this mass shooter and his violent tendencies or of any other that may carry an ASD diagnosis. In every case, other issues are going on with them. Autism and other developmental disabilities do not breed criminality, any more than skin color does. Am I missing anything here?

What Does Breed Serious Crimes?

It seems to me that we seem to be as bent, maybe more, on analyzing what breeds crime than drawing up solutions to it. Professions such as Criminologist and Criminal Profiler have been created to analyze the commission of crimes and those who commit them. Yes, it is fascinating to debate such issues and this is why TV Channels such as Investigative Discovery have been set up, and countless True Crime books written. But with all our study of crimes and criminals, crime seems to get worse. I think all our analyzing is because we all keep trying to make sense of what makes no sense. The answer as to the root cause of all crime is contained in the Scripture. We are told that all actions, including murders, proceed out of the human heart. Yes, the answer is as simple and as unsettling as that. It is simple because it answers our questions. It is unsettling because it means that all of us are, if presented with the "right set of stressors," capable of serious crime. As one person put it, "We are all one bad choice away from a life behind bars." Many of the mass shooters were said to be loners. They felt like outsiders, rejected, isolated and alienated. How many of us have felt this way, and may feel this way now? I guess what separates the rest of us from these mass killers are the grace of God and a moral compass. Unlike the rest of us, they chose to act on what is in the heart of all of us and which is why Christ had to come and die. Let us call it what it is. Sin. That dirty word. I think I should also note something here. Most serious crimes are committed by typical, non-autistic people, but does anyone say, "I guess that is what most typical people do!" No. But that happens every when crimes are committed by minorities. Right?

Scriptures tell us that "Evil people will get worse and worse" the closer and closer we get to Christ's return. This means that, unfortunately, crime will always be with us. Doesn't this tell us that focusing on changing hearts rather than laws may get us closer to the solution here?

What Do Autistic People Need From Our Society?

You surely are aware of a supposed disease that is believed by many to have emerged only in roughly these past two decades. What is this said disease being blamed on? Vaccinations. Who is leading the strong movement appealing to the media and the government? You may have guessed that it is the parents of the children who are believed to be afflicted with this disease. It is believed to be a tragedy and something that we must stand up to and defeat. Yet there are a growing number of us who question this very idea of this supposed epidemic. Why? We see these supposedly suffering children in ourselves. Are we dealing with an epidemic here?

Autism, What Is It?

If you do not identify with the autism community, you still probably are aware of some things. When you visualize the word autism, you may see in your mind's eye a person, especially a child, who cannot speak and who is marked by a series of challenging behaviors. This is accurate, as this is the form that some autism takes. But this is far from the whole picture, or the way autism looks like for many children and adults. Before the past two decades, when professions began recognizing autism as a spectrum, autism was diagnosed only in those who were severely affected, nonverbal, and exhibiting challenging behaviors. Today, we are becoming aware that autism actually is a broad spectrum, from those nonverbal individuals who need assistance with basic self-care, to highly successful and accomplished people with Asperger's Syndrome.

Autism As a Disease or A Difference?

In the autism community, there are factions that are often strongly opposed to each other. These consist of parents of children or relatives diagnosed with autism over these past two decades or those with relatives who were diagnosed with autism before then. Most of these people view autism as a tragic, dreadful disease that needs to be eliminated and "cured." That model is behind controversial nonprofits like Autism Speaks and Generation Rescue, which many parents and relatives of autistic children strongly support. There are a growing number of those, mostly adults, who are self-diagnosed with autism spectrum disorders (ASDs), or have been diagnosed after leaving their teens. We recognize autism not as a "tragic disease in need of a cure," but as a neurological disorder that causes differences in how a person thinks and relates to the world, to others, and to himself. Professionals or volunteers who work with those with ASDs may fall on either the "cure" or "celebrate as a difference" side of the controversy. Why can't both camps or factions seem to find any common ground, but continue to war with one another? I find the fighting and factions within the autism community very unfortunate, as this just increases the stigma of autism and keeps us from working together to get what all of us really want for ourselves and our loved ones with ASDs.

My Experience

My own experience of becoming autism aware did not begin until my daughter was diagnosed before she turned three years old. Hannah was diagnosed with Pervasive Development Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS). The diagnosing pediatric neurologist told us, "PDD-NOS is actually a variant of autism, which we now know occurs along a broad spectrum." Since I was aware of the hugely successful Temple Grandin, herself diagnosed with autism as a child and who miraculously "emerged from it," we held onto hope that Hannah would, too. And our daughter, thanks to her proper diagnosis and early intervention, was able to experience modification of her autistic traits. Thanks to God and to the fact that she has no other conditions along with autism, Hannah has always been mainstreamed, with supports. Today, while she still struggles with social problems, she makes good grades in school, exhibits no challenging behaviors, and seems happy overall. Myself, I identified myself as having a possible ASD for years, courtesy of all my many past and present differences that had never been explained. I spent hours and hours seeking qualified, affordable professionals in my area who could screen me as an adult for an ASD. The few professions that could did not accept my insurance, so I could not go with them. Though I was not open to it at first, I made an appointment at an autism center two hours each way and back and forth, from where I live. The only reason for that was because they had one qualified professional at this center which works with low-income families who are unable to pay. After waiting months for the appointment and more months for the results, I finally was able to see my self-diagnosed ASD become officially confirmed. Relief!

How Does Autism Affect Me?

If you do not identify with any part of the autism community, you may wonder how autism affects you. First of all, you probably know someone who has diagnosed or undiagnosed autism. You may not know this because they may not have disclosed their ASD or their relative's ASD. You may have friends or acquaintances with ASDs. ASD people with unmet needs because of lack of affordable autism services, often either withdrawn from society and fail to contribute to it, or may act out and commit crimes that land them in prison. These are the individuals who fall in the over 70 percent of all ASD adults who lack employment, and who use government assistance programs like Supplemental Security Income or Social Security Disability. These are the individuals who may act out by committing sex crimes or violent crimes. Much more often, ASD people fall victim to those crimes because of their inability to read social signals. When the needs of ASD persons go unmet because they are not served, we lose out on the contributions they can be making and the programs they use cost taxpayers millions. The effects of their committing or falling victim to crime costs us in terms of all the resources that must go to processing them through the justice system, especially through jury trials. Above all, it costs them and their families.

What Can We Do?

We all can do something to help the situation with autistic people, as for people with other disabilities. That is true whatever our life circumstances. First of all, we all can and should educate ourselves about autism and other related disabilities. Below, I provide links to a couple of resources and you can do a Google search to find many others. You can also show your support by signing my autism petition, which is run both on Change.org and on SignOn.org. Please take time to sign both; it take little time to make a big difference. If you know any people with ASDs or other disabilities, welcome them, accept them and befriend them. What is it that autistic people and others with other disabilities need from the rest of us?

Please Sign This Autism Petition at Change.org.

Please Sign This Autism Petition at SignOn.org.

National Autistic Society--United States

National Autistic Society--United Kingdom

Why We All Should Be Concerned About Autism

It is now June 2013, and 1 in 50 children is the average figure for the rate at which children alone are now being diagnosed with an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). This is though the DSM-5 revisions for mental health conditions has been published, and now Asperger's Syndrome (AS) and Pervasive Development Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS). Months ago, the average figure for children had been 1 in every 80 children. That past average and the current one do not even count the adults who are getting diagnosed with ASDs, or underserved minority children and adults whose ASDs are undiagnosed. Months ago, a Facebook page was set up called "Missing Autism Alerts," solely to bring awareness to the sad phenomenon of "autism wandering" that is so prevalent among autistic children and those of any age with more severe ASDs. Many of these autistic missing persons are found safe, but many others are sadly found deceased. Usually in bodies of water. Also, there is the sad epidemic in the autistic community of the abuse and even killing of autistic persons, by caregivers and educators. All of these cases overlap with missing persons and crime cases yet still seem to be seen by so many advocates of the missing as separate. I don't think that this is intentional by these advocates, but it is unfortunate. It shows that so many of us don't realize that autism affects all of us. Therefore, we all as a society would stand to benefit if affordable autism-specific services would be accessible to all of those in all 50 US states who need them. Would such access to services provide us with the means to reduce the many missing autistic persons who are found deceased, and help prevent and reduce the abuse and even killing of autistic individuals by caregivers or educators? Isn't this something to think about?
     Ever since I have been trying to spread awareness about autism among those in my social networks on both of my accounts, I have noticed a trend. I have noticed the same trend in my current petition campaign and efforts to gather signatures. I have noticed that, no matter how I have sought to make autism relatable to all, too many people have shown very little or no support for it. I realize that, if a certain thing has not touched our lives or our families, we are likely to be unconcerned about it or make any effort to educate ourselves about it. I have seen this in my efforts to raise awareness about missing people, even missing children. Many Facebook users got tired of seeing posts of missing people on their homepages and removed me from their friends lists, the main reason I have set up a separate page for missing/unidentified persons and crime victims awareness. It is for the same reason I have set up separate Facebook pages for autism and other related issues. many people in my network don't relate to these issues and so do not show concern or support for these matters. However, missing persons, crime and autism do affect us all, if indirectly.
     In my current Change.org petition campaign, I have done all I can to make my petition as easy to sign and share as I can. I have addressed people's concerns about privacy, assuring them that Change.org only requests that information to verify identities and forward it to petition targets BUT that Change.org will not make any address public. I have assured people that they can remain anonymous by unchecking the "Display My Name Publicly" box there. I have assured people that getting their accounts hacked is very unlikely, that I have signed many Change.org petitions and have had no problem and not heard of anyone else having had any. And I have let people outside the US know that they can still help by giving them links to my Facebook pages where they can forward my petition, even if their signatures are not accepted. I have sought to show how autism affects all of society and every person. Yet, despite all this, I have seen far too many people who have not shown any form of support for this petition or seem to want to educate themselves about autism. Yes, I'm forever grateful to those who do support the practical effort in this petition campaign, to autism-specific services for all those who need them. Still, much more can be done by many more whom I know, in-person and in my social networks. More recently, I have also launched this petition at SignOn.org. On this platform, signers need to be in the US and be at least 18, for signatures to be counted as legitimate.
     Autism is a neurological condition that occurs along a very broad spectrum and affects the way a person perceives and relates to self, to others and to the outside world. Each person's autism is unique, therefore, it is often said: "If you have seen one person with autism, you have seen one person with autism." Autism is still very little understood and is a young field, even though far more is known about it now than twenty years ago and even ten years ago. the "1 in 50" current figure counts only diagnosed people and does not count the less fortunate undiagnosed children with autism spectrum disorders (ASDs) without access to ASD medical workups, or the undiagnosed ASD adults from my generation and younger, who grew up before autism was recognized and diagnosed as a spectrum. For decades, the more severe, classic autism has been diagnosed and treated, though misunderstood as an environmental and "emotional illness" due to bad parenting, while the higher-functioning forms, like Asperger's Syndrome and Pervasive Development Syndrome--Not Otherwise Specified (PDD--NOS) were called other things. Currently, while the "higher-functioning" ASD diagnoses of PDD-NOS and Asperger's Syndrome are no longer official medical diagnoses, I can assure you that they have not gone away and never will. They are just called ASDs. So many in the past, and today, had to grow up with unmet needs. Now I am aware that there are many people who still see the higher-functioning forms of autism, like PDD--NOS and Asperger's Syndrome, as psychological fads and not as real disorders. I know that some professionals see it this way!
I fear that such an attitude may be behind the lack of support I have been seeing for my petition campaign, though it includes adults with the more severe, classic autism. It is also behind much of the obstacles I have faced in accessing ASD screening for myself.
     I'm thankful that my beautiful, precious daughter, diagnosed with PDD--NOS, and her peers, live in a day and age where there is much more autism awareness. Because of this, they can be empowered with the official diagnosis that provides them with the open doors to support services, legal protections and understanding. That was not the case with earlier generation, such as my own 1960s and 1970s generation. I grew up with a mix of differences that a number of those closest to me, and with my agreement, are convinced can only be explained as an undiagnosed ASD. When I was born to my 17-year-old mom, my differences were obvious. Very early, Mom took me to a doctor. "Put her in an institution as she will never be able to function in society," he declared. She, bless her! had ignored this advice. But she continued to take me to professionals to find out what was wrong with me. No one was able to make sense of my mix of challenges. But my withdrawn behavior got me the label of "emotionally-disturbed" and, later, "behaviorally-disordered." Mom had told herself that since I had "emotional problems" and "behavioral problems" that I would "outgrow it." Early in life, I got the "mild cerebral palsy" label and later, I was diagnosed with epilepsy. I experienced much bullying from peers and adults tended to subject me to emotional abuse. I spent my school years in and out (mostly in) special education and two residential placements. One year, my peers bullied me badly enough to get me pulled out of the school in question at the end of the year. The following year, I was back in special education, where I would remain until the end of my school career. For a couple of years, I was prescribed a round of psychiatric drugs that produced bizarre mental side effects and produced radical changes in my personality. I cringe even when thoughts of many of my words and actions at that time come to mind. Because of all of this, I felt deprived of both a childhood and an education. And, even today, I carry the scars from those years. Currently, I have an appointment with an ASD specialist two hours out of my area, but the appointment was scheduled 9 months in advance--last November with still over four months to go.
     And my story is not unique. It is similar to the stories of young people with no access to ASD testing even now, and to the stories of many other adults from my generation and younger or even older. Society will not benefit from from daily being confronted with the frustration, confusion and even desperation of undiagnosed people with unmet needs. For such people often tend to visit upon society these frustrations, in the form of crimes, violent crimes and sexual crimes. When people's needs are not met and they have no outlet for helping themselves, what options do they have but in taking out their anxieties and desperation out on a misunderstanding society? Yes, there are those among them who are fortunate enough to find their niches despite their differences. Because they have been able to work from their strengths instead of living based on their differences, they have not been defined by their differences. I know of a number of people in my own life, successful and well-adjusted, whom I suspected may have had undiagnosed ASDs.
     We all should be concerned about autism because well over 70 percent of adults with autism, including diagnosed ASDs, are unemployed. They are the most unemployed people of any disability group (and this hold true in the UK). And when people are unemployed and don't have independently wealthy families, they typically use government programs as income sources. And many adults with disabilities, especially ASDs, are long-term users of government programs. All of this costs society money; we are missing out on many possible contributions and from many who could be paying taxes. Is this what we want?
     We all should be concerned about autism because when people have unmet needs due to inappropriate or no diagnosis and no support services, these individuals will feel anger, depression, frustration and these will often have few outlets. These people are keenly aware that they are "different" and that much of society is ignorant and unwelcoming. Adults with ASDs often develop mental health issues lead to heavy use of the health care system; so many are uninsured or underinsured. Many are homeless and homeless people are unable to help themselves, much less contribute to society. Since so little is being done to offer such adults "handups" to contribute to society and to pay taxes, these same adults have no choice but to use "handouts." The "handups" do cost us money, but they should save money in the end. This is what my petition is meant to address.
"Pay pennies now to avoid paying pounds later," applies here.
     We should all be concerned about autism because research tells us that people with autism are, much more than typical people, vulnerable to crimes. This is because the tendency to trust people and poor social skills makes it tricky for many to spot scammers or predators and to more easily become victims of crime, violent and nonviolent. Because of poor social skills and because of the pent-up anger many have toward an unwelcoming society, people with ASDs are also more likely to become accused falsely of crimes or actually commit crimes, especially stalking, assault, and sex crimes. And, on top of this, the phenomenon known as "special needs wandering," especially due to autism, contributes to missing people, especially missing children.
     We should all be concerned about autism because it can happen any time within our families. A relative, even an older adults, may have a suspected ASD and may seek an ASD workup and end up with an ASD diagnosis. As I know from personal experience, seeking a medical workup for an ASD evokes strong emotions in people. They ask: Why do you want your child (or yourself) to be checked out for this? What does this say about ME? If you get the ASD diagnosis, what next? How will this change your life? How will this change MY life? What will people think if they hear that shocking "A" word? What good will having a label do for your child (or yourself)? If you have young children or even nieces and nephews or grandchildren, how would you handle it if one (or more) ends up diagnosed with an ASD? And what if you are one, like me, who has grown up with a mix of unexplained differences that may very well fall under the ASD umbrella and want to get a medical workup for this? Whatever the case may be, I'm sure that all of us know people, even close friends, who have never "come out" about their ASDs because of their desire to avoid stigma.
     Now I'm sure that most people are rightfully sympathetic to and aware of the obvious needs and issues of those of any age, who have the more severe, classic autism which has been diagnosed for many decades. Of course, their need for awareness and the full range of support services ought to never be denied. I'm not by any means minimizing the visible needs of these lovely, precious people. And who knows how gifted and intelligent many of them are, if there was only a means for them to communicate? And, thanks to technology, like iPads and "apps for autism," many are able to communicate for the first time! That is, if their families can afford these or get financial help for acquire them. My focus is the higher-functioning forms of autism because so many fall between the cracks due to invisible needs and society's ignorance.
    My beautiful, precious daughter gives all of us much pride and joy. As one autism awareness banner puts it, "Someone with autism makes me smile every day." But I doubt that this would be the case if my daughter's needs were not being met. Will she be among the 70 percent of those with ASDs who fall among the unemployed? And what will happen to my daughter and to many others when they enter adulthood? If they need support services, will these be there for them? Will you help to make a difference, or will you be part of the ignorance and inaction that still surrounds autism? You can make a difference!

http://tiny.cc/mrsahw
This is the link to the Change.org autism petition. I have shortened this link from the original to make it easier to remember and to share on Twitter, by email, and through Instant Messaging.

http://tiny.cc/vq5ztw
This is the link to the SignOn.org autism petition. I have shortened this link from the original to make it easier to remember and to share on Twitter, by email and through Instant Messaging.
    
    

    

What Is the Big Deal About An Autism Diagnosis?

On January 3rd of this current year, I underwent what is called a neurophychological workup, which started out with an interview with a lady. I brought along several materials from an autism center, questionnaires that included questions asking me about past and present "symptoms" of an Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). One questionnaire included a checklist where Mom, my husband, and I circled the answers to the same questions in different colors of ink. I provided a copy for the neuropsychologist, who was filling in for another neuropsychologist I was expecting to see. That person popped his head in the room where I was being interviewed for just a few minutes and I mentioned my concerns. He said, "I see that you have been told many things and given many labels about yourself, like OCD, Asperger's Syndrome, and other psychiatric labels. We here are specialists in epilepsy and you have shared that you have a history of that. I don't think you are aware that epilepsy and side effects of medications to manage it can cause many problems that may make you seem to be OCD or have mental health issues. We are glad you are here and glad to help you find your answers." This person was nice enough and well-meaning, as well as friendly with my husband. However, I could tell from the start that he was biased in favor of epilepsy, his specialty and the field that he was best equipped to form professional opinions on. And he made these above statements BEFORE I began a full day of a battery of tests.

Just yesterday, after almost a month of waiting for my promised summary letter of the "results" of my January 3 appointment, the letter finally arrived in the mail. I opened it up later yesterday afternoon, and I was profoundly disappointed and angered at the "results" but because of the biases of the examiner, I was not surprised in the least of what his summary letter, just a page long, said. It reads. "It is noted that many of your previous psychiatric, behavioral, ans social difficulties may have in fact been related to your epilepsy, rather than to psychiatric disorders." Then came the blow that hurt most of all! "Of note, it is NOT (emphasis mine) believed that you suffer from an Autism Spectrum Disorder." Thus I went to a four hour round trip to undergo a workup, in large part not relevant to screening a person for different brain wiring and which was a bad referral. No diagnosis. No answers. No relief. No validation.

I'm not denying that epilepsy has a major impact on people's daily lives, like any other neurological condition, especially ones of its kind which carry stigma and are widely misunderstood. A number of the items I was tested on in my January 3 appointment were relevant to the side effects of long-term use of prescription medications that I had to take to control seizures (thank God, my current Depakote has fully controlled my seizures for about 16 years but at the cost of major side effects). Testing involved memory tests and other forms of cognitive function, which have been affected by my long-term medication treatment. My main problem with my "results," which include no diagnosis of any kind, is that I know that epilepsy cannot explain my lifetime of social, emotional, and behavioral challenges. Take my lifetime of OCD-like thinking, my repetitive behaviors and obsessive interests, and my insistence on routines. Can those be explained by epilepsy? I think not, especially as they were present early in my life! Take my lifetime of profound social disabilities, my dislike of socializing and making small talk, my inability to initiate or carry conversations, my inability to establish close friendships; these were present from early in my life! Can epilepsy explain those? I think not. I do not doubt that the effects of anti-epileptic meds, the trauma of seizures and stigma can cause emotional and social reactions which mimick some of what I listed above.

I got the that January 3, 2013 appointment by default, I believe and it ended up as an inappropiate ferral for what I was looking for last year. I was looking for an autism specialist who had training in autism and who would screem me for an ASD. Last year 2012,  I had been making many calls requesting a person to screen me for an ASD as an adult. I was given the name of a person, and it was only later that I realized that this person was a neuropsychologist and these professionals usually do not have autism training or expertise; their expertise lies in general brain and cognitive functions and dysfunctions. That does not include any psychiatric or mental health conditions and as ASDs are now placed in the mental health category, neuropsychologists do not specialize in ASDs. Even when I realized that and knew I got a bad referral, I chose to keep the January 3, 2013 appointment, just to rule out things and to go down every avenue. But last year, I did make an appointment with an autism specialist in that same city, who I should have been referred to from the start. I have an appointment with him later this year on October, 29. But due to personal circumstances which must be kept confidential, I may not be able to keep that appointment. But whatever happens, I will stop at nothing until I can access an appointment with a qualified, affordable autism specialist who diagnoses ASDs in adults.

I have, from the beginning, encountered family opposition to my pursuing an ASD diagnosis. When I shared that I was serious about this with family, I have been told things like, "Autism is just a word," "Autism is a label and you cannot tell anyone because people fear those with labels," "If you get a new label people will treat you even worse," "I believe you have autism; why do you need to see a doctor?", "Getting a new label will not do anything for you," and "It will not change your life, so what's the use?" I have faced resistance also from a couple of my doctors, who have told me, "You cannot have an ASD; you relate to people," or, "I do not believe in Asperger's Syndrome; it is a fad and overdiagnosed." I guess I can understand why so many people think those of us who seek "labels" for validation and to empower ourselves to self-advocate, are making "much ado about nothing" or are "sseking excuses for bad behavior" or "crutches" to limp through life. For I am sure some people have done just this, but I have read story after story by adults who testify that getting an official diagnosis of an ASD has provided them with tremendous relief from years, even decades of feelings of shame, failure, not fitting in, and not knowing who they are or "what is wrong with them." They come to see that they are not bad, slow, lazy, crazy, weird but have brains that are wired differently. They feel more confidence to self-advocate when people "don't get them." A new diagnosis does not magically change lives or undo the past, but it gives meaning to everything and closure so one can focus on the future.

This need for much better access to qualified, affordable autism specialists is only one reason that I have created an autism petition on Change.org. Autism services would not benefit only autistic people and their families. These services would create many new jobs, including entry-level jobs, for those outside the autism community. Most in the autism community, especially parents of autistic children, have been lamenting the need for quality, affordable, universal autism services. Many outside the autism community need job. Services also would help autistic people better themselves, which would make it easier for society to understand them and welcome them. So everyone who cares about these things would be wise to support efforts to gain affordable, quality and universal autism services. It is for that eason that I have created my Change.org petition, which can be found at my shortened link for the Change.org site: http://tiny.cc/mrsahw. I encourage all who read this to visit that link. If you have not signed, please visit here. If you've signed, thank you! Please visit and keep sharing. Or keep sharing this BlogSpot.

Interested In Supporting Autism or Its Awareness? Here's How

As most of you who follow the news or who regularly use social networks probably know, a very popular movie called "Bully" is now out and has been showing in movie theaters all over the US. This movie uses the real-life experiences of a number of young people and other features to bring home to the public the reality of bullying and its impact on society. You probably know and may have signed, a Change.or petition called, "Don't Let the Bullies Win! Lower The Bully Movie's Ratings From R to PG-13." The girl who started that petition campaign was 17 and experienced bullying because she had "come out" about being a lesbian. In her petition letter to the film industry, she shared her story of a specific bullying incident ealier in her school years, where a bully had pushed her into a locker and broke her wrist. And even on this Change.org site where people seem to have trouble with both signing and sharing petitions, she had managed to get hundereds of thousands of signatures and had started a movement of people calling for The Bully Movie's ratings to be lowered so that younger kids, who most need to be reached with its message, could view it. I find myself wondering, how had her petition come to the attention of celebrities, including a popular talk show host? How had her petition come to the attention of politicians? What was so compelling about this one girl that her campaign had been so hugely successful and brought her massive backing from the country? Even requests for TV appearances? Because of her campaign but also as importantly, because of the massive support and backing she had received, The Bully Movie is unrated and it is being brought to more and more cites in the US and efforts are being made to bring it to Canada. Naturally, she is being hailed as a hero for starting this petition and for her huge success.
Many of you may, at some time or another, seen my posts about a petition I have started this past Saturday whether you have had a chance to take a look at it or not: http://www.change.org/petitions/1-000-000-people-for-better-lives-for-all-persons-with-autism#share. I started this petition because of personal experience, first of all. I'm mom to a beautiful, precious daughter, who is doing well at home and school, who is diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and one day will age out of her school system. And when that happens she will lose her entitlements to services for children with autism. And I know that this scenario is true for many other children with autism, who are/will age out of their school systems and out of their entitlements to services and resources. I have created the petition also for many adults in the "lost generation" and I am a part of this generation; this is a generation of older adults who grew up before the diagnostic criteria for ASDs like Pervasive Devalopment Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified (PDD-NOS) and Asperger's Syndrome. Some in this "lost generation" have been fortunate enough to conquer their challenges and find success in life; some have been diagnosed with ASDs even in their 50s or 60s. But most of this "lost generation" of adults live on the fringes of society. Many are jobless and use government programs; others work in jobs that don't use their talents or interests. Many develop mental health issues as a result of lifetimes of being misunderstood, abused, bullied and being convinced that that their differences and challenges are due to being bad, stupid, lay or crazy. Most are more vulnerable both to becoming victims or perpretrators of crime and many are homeless. All of this costs society also. IN recent months, I have added to this petition, calling on the US congress to renew existing and reallocate existing funds to expand services for underserved children with autism as well as for their adult counterparts.

Now I'm not starting this petition to gain name recognition or to get in the spotlight; I don't even like being in the spotlight. But I know one thing: I cannot, no matter how hard I work to make it happen, gather a fraction of the signatures that are needed to make this canmpaign a success. What is needed is the guidance, support and rallying of other individuals and organizations who will share my passion for seeing this campaign through until it become reality. I have been contacting prominent nonprofit organizations and certain advocates in the hope that some of them will rally behind me, seeing the need for this and do what they can to multiply my efforts far beyond what I can do myself.
On one of my Facebook pages:https://www.facebook.com/CaringEnoughToMakeADifference, I have been seeing supporters post comments, expressing their concerns that they or others cannot sign or share the petition; one has said "I don't like to use apps." I have gotten at least one post like this on my own page. I'm thankful for people showing interest in signing and am wondering why the petition is not more accessible for both signing and sharing. So I have contacted Change.org because this is unacceptable; I have brought my concerns to them. This morning, I got an email reponse that the issue is being investigated. I have found that on Facebook and in emails that I have been having trouble sending the link to people with success. When I had created the petition and tried to create an ongoing time-frame for how long I have to gather signatures, I got the message that the maximum time frame for a Change.org petition is one year. And my petition goal is 1,000,000 signatures.
On the above-mentioned Facebook page, as petitions are not replacements for many people sending their heartfelt stories and thoughts in emails and handwritten letters to legislators, I plan to include the links to addresses to government-sponsored websites so supporters can correspond with legislators, sharing their thoughts and stories. Most politicians, including the US President, no longer provide their email addresses. You need to send them messages directly from their websites. We can greatly increase our impact when we share our thoughts and stories; even if you feel that you have no personal connection to autism, you can share your thoughts that we need to do all we can to create opportunties for a more accommodating, welcoming world for the ever-growing number of adults with ASDs through funded services in each state. I know that writing to legislator is time-consuming but if many more of us do it we can influence them and increase our impact. We can do this!
My fear is that no matter what I say or do to convey to many people that this issue is relevant to them and the costs to society (of which they are a part), of calling for more services for all people with autism, that they will not support this campaign. This is unfortunate and I hope that many people will prove me wrong. A 17 year old girl was able to garner incredible, wholehearted rallying and support for her campaign on an issue that needed to be addressed through making a movie about it more accessible to more people. My campaign is for another issue that is equally serious and also in need of being addressed. Autism affects all of us.

It is now a brand new year. It is a time of new beginnings. As you make your New Year's resolutions, I hope that you will consider signing this petition if you have not done that yet. If you have signed it already (and I thank you for that) I hope that you will circulate it, using the options I an providing and directing you to, for this. Concerned about privacy? You can uncheck the box "Display my Name Publicly" and your name will not be seen on the petition page. You will be asked your address but it will not be made public; only your name, state and zip code are. Outside the US and interested in signing? There is an option of "Outside the US?" there. Whatever other objections you have to signing, I hope you will reconsider. There are so many in the autism community, including many parents of children with autism, who are crying out for services, or more services, to be made available and affordable to them. So many adults are experiencing failure in all areas of their lives because they do not have services. Because of all this, society does not know how to welcome many with differences due to autism. We can make a difference and change that!

Ideas for supporting this campaign:

1) If you know a lot about computers or website development or have a blogspot or website that gets many visitors, visit my petition site at http://www.change.org/petitions/1-000-000-people-for-better-lives-for-all-persons-with-autism#share. Consider adding my petition to your own site as a widget so your own supporters can sign it right there without leaving your site. And if you are so inclined, I would appreciate it if you would show me how to set up a website with a widget to my petition. But what I would most like to see is my petition being added to your own websites as a widget.

2) If you know other people or organizations that would help with this, share your referrals to me at ldesherl@gmail.com or at my Facebook pages at the links below.

3) Visit my Facebook pages https://www.facebook.com/CaringEnoughToMakeADifference and/or https://www.facebook.com/OnLifeLoveAndTruth  and you will keep seeing the petition being reposted for easier sharing; keep sharing it, over and over, with those in your social networks.

4) On the petition sites at the link at option #1, you can find the Facebook "Share" option there. The names of your friends should show up in alphabetical order. It can be tricky to use; when people's wall settings are locked you will get the notice "Unable to get permission from Facebook" when you hit "Share" to send the petition to such Facebook users. You need to get rid of the notice at the top of the site for further sharing. Change.org will allow only 16 "Shares" a day. But if many of you take the time to use this option, it helps a lot.

5). Please visit my website at http://caringenoughtomakeadifference.com where my petition is on a widget and can be signed at the site. This site is under construction but has many things in place already. At the site is also a page that shows the actual petition text. I have not yet been able to create the page set up for petition flyer. Much more is planned there but this site is helpful to share especially with those in your life who do not socially network; sharing this site is promoting the petition.

5)Any other ideas you have would be much appreciated!

Another Tragedy, Hate, Autism and Stigma

          It is Friday, a week after the the tragic school shooting at Sandy Hook Elementary School. This shooting took the lives of 20 innocent children and 6 brave educators who died trying to save their students. Then Adam Lanza killed himself. Before all this he had killed his own mother and this brought the victim count up to 27. This tragedy so shook us up that many politicians and their supporters have re-thought their postition on the loaded issue of guns and the role that guns should play in protecting us and our children. But I'm not going to discuss guns here. It is like this shooting just happened. This shooting broke the hearts of the USA and the world in a way no other shooting seems to have, no doubt because so many children lost their lives as well as so many brave educators. We all continue to offer all the grieving families our most profound empathy, our prayers, our support and out commitment to make sure that this never happens again.
          However, this tragedy seems to have claimed even more victims than the victims of Sandy Hook Elementary School and those in Newtown, Connecticut. This was through the irresponsible coverage of the media and the equally irresponsible actions of Adam Lanza's brother. Almost as soon as reports came out last week about the tragedy, it was brought to my attention that Ryan Lanza, Adam's brother, said that his brother had a develpomental disability. Later in the afternoon, it was brought to my attention that Adam may have Asperger's Syndrome. And as I scrolled through Facebook, I saw news articles and heard on TV that afternoon, speculation that Adam, the shooter, had Asperger's Syndrome. Autism Advocacy groups and nonprofits put together statements doing "damage control" in their fervent effort to combat the new backlash of meeting hate with scapegoating a group of people, spreading ignorance, fear and more hate. My thoughts and the thoughts of many others in the autism community, who are relatives or loved ones with autism or who are on the spectrum of autism ourselves, was: Here we go again! Getting painted with a broad brush! Being made a whipping post! Making our stigma even worse!
          Earlier this year, in the aftermath of another shooting, a talk show host had surmised that the shooter "had to be on the autism spectrum." Immediately, this generated wrath in the autism community. A petition was promptly set up, demanding that the talk show host apologize to the autism community and it took off overnight, soaring well past mine in signatures even though it calls for autism services. Now this backlash has occurred again and as tshe did in the aftermath of that shooting, one person in my social networks has put up as her profile photo the banner, "Autism Does Not Cause Murder!" Currently, a Facebook page is up and is called, "Cure Asperger's--Stop Child Psychokillers." I posted, asking others to report it and I reported the page myself. It is still up.
          I know that it is human nature to try to make sense of the senseless by looking for scapegoats to blame. The tossing the words autism and Asperger's Syndrome and linking them to mental health issues was also irresponsible. To be fair, many in the media have tried to correct the mistakes that they should never have made in the first place, stating that "There is no link between Asperger's Syndrome and violence." But it seems that much of this is irreparable, simply because many people are uninformed in the first place and media is powerful in shaping public opinion. Also, the Facebook page that I reported has not been taken down by Facebook--yet.
          Why are so many quick to scapegoat autism and Asperger's Syndrome? I think is is because so many people are uninformed and think that autism is a mental health condition because it affects how a person relates to other people. Then there is the widespread misconception that people with autism lack empathy. The facts are that autism and Asperger's Syndrome are neurological conditions that affects the way that individuals relate to the world, themselves and process information. Study after study show that people with autism are much more likely to become crime victims than its perpetrators. And there is something else that very few in the media have brought out. Guess what? Two of the children who were killed at Sandy Hook were diagnosed with autism! One of the little victims is a girl whose parents have just shared with the public that their daughter had autism as well as other conditions. The other little victim was a boy who died in the arms of his aide, who bravely died trying to save him and other children. This tells me and I'm sure others, that autism is still seen in a negative light and still carries a big stigma, so that most are not mentioning that two of the 20 children murdered in this shooting were touched by autism. I find this unfortunate and sad.
          Growing up, I was given labels that cause any sane person to link such labels with violence and have traditionally carried worse stigmas that either autism or Asperger's. And these labels have never explained my mix of differences growing up till present. My behavior was not even explainable by these labels. Now the diagnosis I am seeking is being linked with violence too? But because there is nothing more devastating that not feeling that you belong anywhere, even with this backlash against autism, nothing can dim my resolve to access this diagnosis. People who do not think a sense of belonging is a big deal do so because they have always know this advantage and do not know what it is like not to know it. Also, I have a daughter who had the diagnosis of autism and like so many other parents, I have some measure of concern with how this all will affect how people will see her and treat her. The current backlash against autism is being perpetrated by people who are uninformed, ignorant and focused on meeting hate with hate. They are creating more victims of this terrible tragedy and causing so many of us to not only deal with the profound heartbreaking impact of  the massacre, but with the backlash against us.
          It is true that aggressive behavior is common in many with different forms of autism and that "autistic meltdowns" are very common. But these are VERY unlike the kind of predatory, planned and premeditated violence that Adam did last Friday. Autistic anger and rage is impulsive and usually a response to sensory overload or is a build-up of anger at an unwelcoming world that is so often uninformed. When autistic people have committed crimes, it is not because of their autism but because of other undiagnosed or diagnosed mental health conditions. Many people with Asperger's or autism are caring, empathic, nonviolent and have a wery well-developed sense of ethics. It is usually nondisabled and nonautistic people who have been known to commit heinous crimes against other people. People with autism or with other disabilities are much more at-risk of becoming victims of all kinds of crimes than of committing crimes.
          Yes, I know that the focus of all of us should be on this tragedy in Newtown and on supporting,  caring and praying for all the families and survivors of this massacre. Their lives are changed forever and none of it had to happen. Every crime, every murder, and every mass murder is 100 percent preventable. But to meet hate with hate and to scapegoat an entire people group which faces enough obstacles as it is, is totally wrong. Every such mass shooting and every heinous criime is caused by multiple factors. I know that the national discussion is calling for tighter gun laws. Others are calling for prayer to be "put back into our public schools." Many are calling for improved mental health care and much better access to mental health services. Some are calling for arming teachers and educators. Many of us are calling for our society to become more caring and to reach out to those who are struggling with severe issues as Adam Lanza seems to had been doing, or to take an interest in those who are "at-risk" because of their life circumstances.
          I am sure that most of you know that I have an active petition calling for autism services which is still open and active. This petition speaks for all people with autism and at all levels of function. The services would help decrease ignorance, fear and hate and ultimately benefit society through many more contributions and taxpayers. Yet I fear that the backlash against autism will hinder people, uninformed to begin with, from supporting this petition if they have absorbed any of these rumors and believe them to any degree. There is not any evidence that Adam had Asperger's and because of HIPPA laws, his doctors are unable to legally confirm this to the public. This is beside the point; even if Adam had autism, this neurological condition would not have made any contribution to what caused him to enter that school and murder 27 people, two of who were little children (out of 20) who themselves had autism! The media neglect to point out that according to much research, people with autism are far more often the victims of crime than perpetrators. My holiday wish is that you will sign my petition and once having done that, will share it widely with this short and easily remembered link: http://tiny.cc/mrsahw.
          The ultimate cause of this massacre, of all crime and all wrongdoing is an old-fashioned word called SIN and hate in people's hearts. We are all, given the right circumstances, capable of such acts. This is why we all need a Savior. Christmas is all about celebrating and focusing on the wonder that such a Savior came and became one of us, a human, many years ago. God is our ultimate hope and the answer to all the problems in human hearts.
         
         

How About Empathy for Autism?

     I'm sure that by now, virtually all of us have hear about the recent, horrific Aurora, Colorado shooting that where a 24-young man proceeded to shoot over 70 people, and 12 of thse people, including a six-year-old girl, were killed. The lives of many, many people will never be the same and the losses that they have suffered will say with them for the rest of their lives. And this shooter was said to be a loner, though, according to recent reports, his classmates in high school don't remember him to be like that. This gunman was talented, bright, had much potential and a good furture ahead of him? Wht would he throw it all away? His motive has never been made clear.
     In the wake of this mass murder, I only learned about the outrage in the autism community secondhand, when I saw a post where the person who posted the article commented on it: "This makes my blood boil." The very headline of the article stated that a Joe Scarborough, of MSNBC's "Morning Joe," had made a comment where he says that the gunman "might have been on the autism scale." Now, before this, I was unfamilar with the name of this journalist as I don't follow "Morning Joe." If I had heard the comment with my own ears, I may have had more of a reaction to it. And then, seemingly within hours, a petition on Change.org had been started and it already had twice as many signatures as mine, though it was new! And, within days, a person posted this: "Wow! This petition already has over 10,000 signatures!" Frankly, I was more annoyed than anything, that Scarborough had made an ill-advised remark that caused support for my own petition to slip as some who were actvely promoting my petition were promoting this new petition, which angrily called for Joe Scarborough to make a "genuine apology" to the autism community and to "retract his statement." I ended up signing it and I had left him a link to my petition, also tweeting it to him, "Please sign my petition to support the autism community."
     As it is, in my newsfeed one day, I saw a link to the petition letter for the petition to Scarborough which had taken the autism community by storm and distracted people in that community from actively promoting my petition. In her letter to Scarborough, the petition creator, who is highly esteemed and valued in the autism community and whose blogspot has won an award for one of the top "autism blogs" of all time, wrote an eloquent letter to him. However, some things in her letter and much of the outrage over Scarbough's remark, seem to miss the point. She made a statement that the gunman had never even been diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder (ASD). This irked me; there are many undiagnosed people with ASDs. Also, she stated that no person who has been diagnosed with an ASD has been convicted of violent crime, which I know to be very untrue. I had read a Huffington post article which contained Scarborough's comment and his later attempt at an apology that was seen as a poor attempt at apologizing, a "nonapology." Actually, I had learned, which I never knew before, that Scarborough has a son with Asperger's Syndrome who he is proud of. You read the article for yourself: http://huffingtonpost.com/2012/07/23/joe-scarborough-james-holmes-autism_n_1694599.html.
     Actually, Scarborough had meant to say that people who feel and are marginalized are more vulnerable to feeling and even acting on the anger and desperation that can drive some to commit such heinous crimes. And many people with autism DO feel and are marginalized. But most do not turn to murder to solve their problems; most will cope in their own ways, even "faking it" or withdrawing from others, but most do not turn to mass murder. The crimes that people with ASDs tend to be convicted of, because of poor social skills and anger at a society that has not welcomed them, are stalking, sex crimes and assault. I have read of a few people with ASDs who have been convicted of murder, but not many. Yes, I wish that Scarborough had not said what he did; he definitely had put his foot in his mouth, especially being the father of a child with an ASD! The remark was uncalled-for as there is not a scintilla of evidence that the gunman was even suspected of having an ASD, much less having the official diagnosis.
     I don't understand why an "empathy deficit," a fancy way of saying that one of the features of an ASD is a reduced ability to empathize with others, is one of the criteria for an official diagnosis or is one of the questions that I had to answer just to determine of I "may have an ASD." For my experience tells me that it is NOT the possession of empathy that is a problem with having an ASD, but expressing it in appropriately. And why all the questions about whether people with autism have empathy or not? Let's flip it over; what about nonautistic people having empathy for the experience of autism? We all know that many people off the spectrum are challenged in the empathy department, but no one EVER says, " Nonautistic people have an empathy deficit." But people tend to say this about those with ASDs.
     What about empathy for autism? What about the many who live with ASDs that we are not even able to get a proper diagnosis for, because we cannot find a qualified, affordable professional who will check us out for this? And what about empathizing with our feelings of shame, guilt, confusion, disconnection, and always wondering what is REALLY wrong with us? What about empathizing with those young people who may have made great gains in early childhood intervention, yet when they age out of their school systems and out of services entitlements, they find that they must give up any dreams they have to work at careers they would love or businnesses they would like to start, because they still need support and accommodations but these are not there for them? What about empathy for those adults with ASDs who have a history of one failed relationship after another, not only because of their own poor social skills but because people refuse to accept quirks or differences? What about empathizing with those who "come out," even with employers, about their ASDs and who find the door of acceptance slammed in their faces because people still will not bother to educate themselves about ASDs? What about empathizing for all those children with ASDs who are more vulnerable to being bullied because their differences mark them out as easy targets? What about empathy for those with ASDs who encounter uninformed law enforcement officials and who find themselves on the wrong side of the law because they "look suspicious"? What about empathizing with all those children in minority communities whose undiagnosed ASDs will keep them from having appropriate educations or good futures? What about empathizing with those who feel so trapped and overwhelmed by caring for their loved one with an ASD, that they resort to murder because they see no other options and have no support? What about their loved ones?
     All this underscores the need that adults with autism have for support services and that is why I have created my petition. Yes, funds for more autism research and funds for better training for professionals, like doctors and counselors, would need to be part of this and are included in my petition letter to my petition targets. These support services would empower people with ASDs to reach their potentials, to contribute to society and to pay taxes. Indirectly, the support services can reduce crime, poverty, unemployment and homelessness caused by many having unmet needs. It can even save lives and rescue parents or caregivers from resorting to the unthinkable because they see no other way out! So, if you have not signed the petition, what are you waiting for? And even if you are not in the US, you can still pass it on.

My petition can be signed at: http://tiny.cc/mrsahw
To share my petition with even those who are not on social networks, please share the petition widget at my website (under construction): http://caringenoughtomakeadifference.com.
To fing and easily share my petition on Facebook, please go here: https://www.facebook.com/?ref=tn_tnmn#!/ChildrenWithAutismBecomeAdultsWithAutism

Why We Should Be Concerned About Autism

     Ever since I have been trying to spread awareness about autism among those in my social networks on both of my accounts, I have noticed a trend. I have noticed the same trend in my current petition campaign and efforts to gather signatures. I have noticed that, no matter how I have sought to make autism relatable to all, too many people have shown very little or no support for it. I realize that, if a certain thing has not touched our lives or our families, we are likely to be unconcerned about it or make any effort to educate ourselves about it. I have seen this in my efforts to raise awareness about missing people, even missing children. Many Facebook users got tired of seeing posts of missing people on their homepages and removed me from their friends lists, the main reason I have set up a separate page for missing/unidentified persons and crime victims awareness.
     In my current petition campaign, I have done all I can to make my petition as easy to sign and share as I can. I have addressed people's concerns about privacy, assuring them that Change.org only requests that information to verify identities and forward it to petition targets BUT that Change.org will not make any address public. I have assured people that they can remain anonymous by unchecking the "Display My Name Publicly" box there. I have assured people that getting their accounts hacked is very unlikely, that I have signed many Change.org petitions and have had no problem and not heard of anyone else having had any. And I have let people outside the US know that they can still help by giving them links to my Facebook pages where they can forward my petition, even if their signatures are not accepted. I have sought to show how autism affects all of society and every person. Yet, despite all this, I have seen far too many people who have not shown any form of support for this petition or seem to want to educate themselves about autism.
     Autism is a neurological condition that occurs along a very broad spectrum and affects the way a person perceives and relates to self, to others and to the outside world. Each person's autism is unique, therefore, it is often said: "If you have seen one person with autism, you have seen one person with autism." Autism is still very little undersood and is a young field, even though far more is known about it now than twenty years ago and even ten years ago. the "1 in 88" current figure counts only diagnosed people and does not count the less fortunate undiagnosed children with autism spectrum disorders (ASDs) without access to ASD medical workups, or the undiagnosed ASD adults from my generation and younger, who grew up before autism was recognized and diagnosed as a spectrum. For decades, the more severe, classic autism has been diagnosed and treated, though misunderstood as an environmental and "emotional illness" due to bad parenting, while the higher-functioning forms, like Asperger's Syndrome and Pervasive Development Syndrome--Not Otherwise Specified (PDD--NOS) were called other things. So many in the past, and today, had to grow up with unmet needs. Now I am aware that there are many people who still see the higher-functioning forms of autism, like PDD--NOS and Asperger's Syndrome, as psychological fads and not as real disorders.
I fear that such an attitude may be behind the lack of support I have been seeing for my petition campaign, though it includes adults with the more severe, classic autism.
     I'm thankful that my beautiful, precious daughter, diagnosed with PDD--NOS, and her peers, live in a day and age where there is much more autism awareness. Because of this, they can be empowered with the official diagnosis that provides them with the open doors to support services, legal protections and understanding. That was not the case with earlier generation, such as my own 1960s and 1970s generation. I grew up with a mix of differences that a number of those closest to me, and with my agreement, are convinced can only be explained as an undiagnosed ASD. When I was born to my 17-year-old mom, my differences were obvious. Very early, Mom took me to a doctor. "Put her in an institution as she will never be able to function in society," he declared. She, bless her! had ignored this advice. But she continued to take me to professionals to find out what was wrong with me. No one was able to make sense of my mix of challenges. But my withdrawn behavior got me the label of "emotionally-disturbed" and, later, "behaviorally-disordered." Early in life, I got the "mild cerebral palsy" label and later, I was diagnosed with epilepsy. I experienced much bullying from peers and adults tended to subject me to emotional abuse. I spent my school years in and out (mostly in) special education and two residential placements. One year, my peers bullied me badly enough to get me pulled out of the school in question at the end of the year. The following year, I was back in special education, where I would remain until the end of my school career. For a couple of years, I was prescribed a round of psychiatric drugs that produced bizarre mental side effects and produced raical changes in my personality. I cringe even when thoughts of many of my words and actions at that time come to mind. Because of all of this, I felt deprived of both a childhood and an education. And, even today, I carry the scars from those years.
     And my story is not unique. It is similar to the stories of young people with no access to ASD testing even now, and to the stories of many other adults from my generation and younger or even older. Society will not benefit from from daily being confronted with the frustration, confusion and even desperation of undiagnosed people with unmet needs. For such people often tend to visit upon society these frustrations, in the form of crimes, violent crimes and sexual crimes. When people's needs are not met and they have no outlet for helping themselves, what opitions do they have but in taking out their anxieties and desperation out on a misunderstanding society?
     We all should be concerned about autism because well over 70 percent of adults with autism, including diagnosed ASDs, are unemployed. They are the most unemployed people of any disability group (and this hold true in the UK). And when people are unemployed and don't have independently wealthy families, they typically use government programs as income sources. And many adults with disabilities, especially ASDs, are long-term users of government programs. All of this costs society money; we are missing out on many possible contributions and from many who could be paying taxes. Is this what we want?
     We all should be concerned about autism because when people have unmet needs due to inappropriate or no diagnosis and no support services, these individuals will feel anger, depression, frustration and these will often have few outlets. These people are keenly aware that they are "different" and that much of society is ignorant and unwelcoming. Adults with ASDs often develop mental health issues lead to heavy use of the health care system; so many are uninsured or underinsured. Many are homeless and homeless people are unable to help themselves, much less contribute to society. Since so little is being done to offer such adults "handups" to contribute to society and to pay taxes, these same adults have no choice but to use "handouts." The "handups" do cost us money, but they should save money in the end. This is what my petition is meant to address.
"Pay pennies now to avoid paying pounds later," applies here.
     We should all be concerned about autism because research tells us that people with autism are, much more than typical people, vulnerable to crimes. This is because the tendency to trust people and poor social skills makes it tricky for many to spot scammers or predators and to more easily become victims of crime, violent and nonviolent. Because of poor social skills and because of the pent-up anger many have toward an unwelcoming society, people with ASDs are also more likely to become accused falsely of crimes or actually commit crimes, especially stalking, assault, and sex crimes. And, on top of this, the phenomenon known as "special needs wandering," especially due to autism, contributes to missing people, especially missing children.
     We should all be concerned about autism because it can happen any time within our families. A relative, even an older adults, may have a suspected ASD and may seek an ASD workup and end up with an ASD diagnosis. As I know from personal experience, seeking a medical workup for an ASD evokes strong emotions in people. They ask: Why do you want your child (or yourself) to be checked out for this? What does this say about ME? If you get the ASD diagnosis, what next? How will this change your life? How will this change MY life? What will people think if they hear that shocking "A" word? What good will having a label do for your child (or yourself)? If you have young children or evenn nieces and nephews or grandchildren, how would you handle it if one (or more) ends up diagnosed with an ASD? And what if you are one, like me, who has grown up with a mix of unexplained differences that may very well fall under the ASD umbrella and want to get a medical workup for this? Whatever the case may be, I'm sure that all of us know people, even close friends, who have never "come out" about their ASDs because of their desire to avoid stigma.
     Now I'm sure that most people are rightfully sympathetic to and aware of the obvious needs and issues of those of any age, who have the more severe, classic autism which has been diagnosed for many decades. Of course, their need for awareness and the full range of support services ought to never be denied. I'm not by any means minimizing the visible needs of these lovely, precious people. And who knows how gifted and intelligent many of them are, if there was only a means for them to communicate? And, thanks to technology, like Ipads and "apps for autism," many are able to communicate for the first time! That is, if their families can afford these or get financial help for acquire them. My focus is the higher-functioning forms of autism because so many fall between the cracks due to invisible needs and society's ignorance.
    My beautiful, precious daughter gives all of us much pride and joy. As one autism awareness banner puts it, "Someone with autism makes me smile every day." But I doubt that this would be the case if my daughter's needs were not being met. And what will happen to my daughter and to many others when they enter adulthood? If they need support services, will these be there for them?
    
    

    
    

Do We Really Mean That?

"No comment."--Actually, by saying this, we DO intend to declare our opinion BUT we are unwilling to give it because either we think other people should know what it is already, we assume that they know what we think. Another reason for this one is that we don't want people to know what our actual opinion is but we definitely want them to know that we hold a strong opinion on the subject concerned. Once, on a popular talk show, a certain person was heavily criticized for her actions; a guest was discussing this person. The talk show host snorted, "No comment from me." Months ago, I saw a political post on a Facebook user's page and I saw mention of a certain politician whom I have always held a strong opinion on. In the comments area, I posted, "No comment from me about this individual."

"Never again!" Actually, we normally say this in the wake of betrayal or disappointment where we quite understandably don't want to experience that agony again. I'm sure countless divorced people and rejected lovers have said this at the time. But the fact that so many of those lovers move to new relationships and so many divorced people remarry, show that this is a phrase often said in the heat of emotion and not deliberate choice. After my most recent bad experience with a nonprofit, I said, "Never again." So far, I have stood by this, but who knows?

"I don't care." Actually, so often when we declare this, we are really striving to convince ourselves that we don't care about something that really matters to us, but which or who has let us down. There is a popular song called, "I Don't Care Anymore," and this is the refrain in the song. But if this song is true, would it actually be the case that the rejected lover is trying to convince himself that he doesn't care in order to dull or numb the pain? In a certain book, the character is depicted as declaring, in response to another friend's rejection, "I don't care." The book goes on to state that this character DID care.

"I'm fine." Actually, so often when we say this we are ANYTHING but fine. I know that this is the standard part of the answer to the greeting, "How are you doing?" Yes, a greeting. I have so often though that this converastional interchange, like much small talk, is really a waste of time and just fills the air with empty talk. And detesting small talk and doing poorly in it, is a common trait in Asperger's Syndrome and autism. Aside from this, it is dishonest to state that we are "doing just fine" when we may be anxious, depressed, ill, lonely, or have suffered a loss, trauma or tragedy. Yet can we really say how we ACTUALLY are to people whom we don't know or don't know well? Not really. But to say, "I'm fine"? Yet when we keep up this small talk in settings like close friendships, family or our comgregational settings, is not appropriate. In these settings, we should be able to be honest and open about who we are and not have to pretend. Yet even in these setting, too many of us do this.

"Don't worry." I suspect that many times we say this because, somewhere in the back of our minds, we know that there IS cause to be concerned. Or else why would we even ask a person not to worry? Normally, this reassurance is offered when there some cause for concern in a situation or the person whom we are talking to is worried about something. I well recall that when I expressed my concern to a person, "I was told, "Do not fear," and yet, I soon found that I had cause for concern in that instance. In that instance, the outcome was not a good one. So when I hear such a reassurance, I don't know if I can or should trust it or if the person knows something I don't. Or why would I be asked not to worry? Now I'm sure there are many times when "Don't worry" means that while there is cause to worry, that things will ultimately work out.

"I'm starving." Yes, I know that in even in the developed world, hunger is a reality for many people for different reasons. But among us in this part of the world, it is easy to confuse appetite and true hunger. We may say, "I'm starved" when we really mean that our appetites are turned on, especially for foods high in fat, salt and sugar. Right? I'm quite sure the vast majority of children and many adults use this phrase when hunger is not the issue. And not knowing the difference between appetite and true hunger is the reason so many people are overweight or even obese. And we know all the health risks that come with being heavy and I will not discuss them here. "Starving" actually refers to literally not getting enough food, protein, calories and even fat, to sustain existence. It IS the accurate phrase, of course, to describe the plight of countless people in Third World countries.

"Cry me a river." Actually, this is something we say when we are NOT interested in hearing about someone's woes or seeing any tears they may cry because we are convinced that they have no cause to carry on about their probems. When criminals, accused or convicted, complain about their situations or make excuses for their actions or have shed tears over their sentences, I have often heard this phrase as the indignant response.

"I need it." Actually, we often say this when we really want something and are convinced that life is not worth living if we do not get it. Even as I write this, I know that I have said this concerning things I have set my heart on that I know, deep down, I could live without if I knew how to navigate life without these things I so desire. And I know that all of of parents have often heard our children cry out about things they want, even if these are downright bad for them, "I need, I need, I need!" And yes, we, as children, we cried out even about things that are downright bad for us, "I need, I need, I need!" But wants and needs are not the same thing. Our needs are essential for our physical, emotional, and spiritual survival. Our wants may help fill our needs or they may not. And spiritual needs are often unfelt needs. For example, the Bible declares, from cover to cover, that we need to trust God. But how many of us FEEL this as a need? On the other hand, we may desire soda or sweets in the worst way, but do we NEED these?

"It's nothing." Actually, we often say this when we just don't want to talk about something that is very important to us, even of central importance to us. I know that I have said this when I did not feel comfortable talking about a subject of great importance to me. So even if someone tells us, "It's nothing," when we ask them what is bothering them, we probably should not take take that at face value. Yes, it may be the easier thing to do but it may be a serious, even fatal mistake!

"We need to talk." These words have always, in my experience, been the preamble for bad news that I was about to receive. And I suspect that this phrase is used when ACTUALLY we have to deliver bad news that the other person is not going to want to hear and so we are laying the groundwork for the delivery of our bad news. In one instance, a person sent me an email simply saying that "I need to talk to you about stuff." This person was not going to tell me that she was setting up a meeting to give me bad news but instead, just gave me the impression that this was a social thing. But when I made it to this meeting, I rapidly saw that this was no social encounter but a venue for bad news. In another instance and more recently, another person sent me an email and told me that she had to talk to me about a matter. I knew this was going to be bad news and when the person called me later, I found that I was right!

"You are great, good, beautiful, smart, talented, but----". So often, it seems that people heap compliments on us as a way to ward off a blow starting with, "but" and the "but" is usually either bad news or criticism that we know the person will not want to hear, even be devastated by. I know that this approach is often recommended when we have to give criticism or bad news and want to do it in the least hurtful way possible and soften the blow. I experienced this when a certain nonprofiit would not admit me on their team. The person contacting me heaped me with praise about my personality and character before telling me, "You application to volunteer with us has been declined." I have heard the word "but" so often be used when praising people and their qualities that often I wonder how sincere such praise is. And I know that we use the word "but" as a disclaimer in countless other contexts having nothing to do with people. Yes, I'm sure such comments may often be sincere but I can't help but wonder if "but" is being used to cancel out all the good things that were just said.