Boy Meets Depression by Kevin Breel

This book is a memoir rather than a fact-laden autobiogaphy. Therefore, it is oreganizd like a novel and reads like one. Kevin Breel, the author, begins with a short introduction, giving a short overview of why he wrote his book and what he wants it to do in the mind and life of the reader. This memoir is arranged in ten chapters. The author ends with an Epilogue, giving a summary of the book and re-iterating what he hopes the book has and will do in the life and mind of the reader. He continues with his personal acknowledgments to the people in his life who made his healing possible and/or who made this book possible. He ends it all with One More Note to the Reader, recommending reaching out for help if depressed and recommending the nonprofit To Write Love On Her Arms.

This is not a book for the head, to deal in facts and focus on them. It is a book for the heart and appeals to emotions. Breel often uses salty language including the "f---" bomb, and writes like one putting his thoughts on paper. I found it interesting and I was drawn into it early. I was saddened when he lost his best friend, and when it caused him to spiral downward emotionally. I liked it that he had an educator who took an interest in him and in his healing, and believed in him even when he did not believe in himself and encouraged him to fulfill his potential. I realize that many teens and young people do not have this blessing, and that explains why so many wander aimlessly through life, and others even take up lives of crime. And, like so many teens, he kept his dark depression from his parents, and I can understand why he was not keen on going to see a counselor. Breel sills his raw emotions onto paper, and does not hold back. I found in this book a peek into the modern, 21st century teenage world, and hence in the worlds of my daughter and her peers. This books is pretty much what I expected, fast-paced, deep-thinking, emotionally-laden, and candid. As for the profanity, I ignored it, knowing that this is not a book written from a Christian worldview. It was a fast-paced read, mostly descriptive rather than prescriptive.

I recommend this book for all those who are thinking of working with teens and young people, whether as teachers, counselors, youth ministers, juvenile corrections officers, child psychologists or in a volunteer capacity of any kind. Because it gives a peek into the teen world, it should be required reading in the training of anyone who seeks to qualify himself or herself in working with teens or young people. It is good reading for teens themselves but because of the profanity I think they should be warned about that before they read it, and that we need not curse to get our point across. It should be read by all parents of teens so they can see what the world of today's teens is like and to alert them to be aware that teen depression is common and how to intervene.

I received a complimentary copy of this book from Blogging for Books, in exchange for my honest review. I was not required to give a positive review of this book.

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Suicide, Mental Illness & Depression: How Should We respond?

If you have been listening to the news at all, you have some knowledge of the horrific plane crash that killed some 150 people last week. Not one person survived that awful crash. Many, many lives have forever altered, including hundreds of families. Yes, three Americans were also killed in this crash. We have been learning that this crash was no accident and that the responsible party was the co-pilot. He had deliberately crashed this plane.

The Responsible Co-pilot and Mental Illness

In these past few days, as the investigation of the co-pilot in that plane crash has begun, the media has let out more ad more details of the pilot's situation. First of all, he was said to have had a history of "metal health issues" though he seemed likable and pleasant to those who knew him. He was quoted as saying that "I have depression." He would not report his mental health issues, fearing stigma, fearing that he would lose his pilot's license. You may very well think: He would rather risk the lives of 149 people plus his own, rather than stigmatizing himself through self-disclosure? While his attitude and his lie of omission may indeed have been deceptive, why is it that he would have felt the "need" to lie by omission in the first place? He was said to be "unfit to fly." I understand that the FAA had lifted the stigma of mental illness, allowing pilots with a history of mental illness to fly (correct me if I am wrong). Yes, I agree the piloting a plane, with multiple human lives in your hands, is an awesome responsibility. It is a privilege, not a right. He should not even have been put in that position. Clearly we do not want to deny people with depression or a history of mental illness the right to participate in life and to be full citizens and to reach their full potential. But we do not want to put the lives of the public at risk, either. This is much like seizures and driving or eyesight and driving, both which can keep one from driving for purely safety reasons. We may never know all which actually happened in that awful plane crash and what was in that co-pilot's mind or going on in his life. But what a sad, sad waste of human lives and all the permanently altered lives of many families, including his own! What was it all for?

The Faces of Mental Illness and Suicide

Many of us are aware of depression, mental illness and suicide. We just do not talk about these issues in casual conversation and they are subjects that we may speak about in hushed tones. What would cause a co-pilot to protect his pilot license above many human lives, including his own? Last year, I followed a case of a missing mom with two young children. It was not long before her body was found. The death was ruled as a suicide. That troubled me and still troubles me to this day, as this mom had two small children. Her family was not questioning the ruling or challenging law enforcement to re-open their quickly closed investigation, and see if this mom's death may have been a homicide. This mom's case still bothers me. I think many of us are aware of the sad statistic of (how may? fourteen a day?) veterans who end their lives by suicide. I have been visiting a certain website that contains many webpages for those dealing with various mental illnesses. Yes, there are those who deny the existence of mental illness and call it other things, and hold that it is man-made and a brainchild of modern pop psychology. I agree that too often, psychiatric medications may be over-prescribed and these medications may cover up deeper problems that should be addressed through working through issues with a counselor or pastor. But mental illness and depression are not imaginary or man-made and keeping the stigma going through silence, will not solve this problem. It will not keep people like co-pilots from flying when they should not. It will just go underground.

Are Mental Illness and Suicide Matters of Character and Faith?

I read many Christian articles and books. Mental illness and depression are divisive subjects in the Christian community. Some Christian circles see depression and suicide as viable physical illnesses of the mind that should be treated as illnesses. There are other Christians circles that believe that depression and mental illness are matters of faith and character, and should be treated as moral wrongs rather than as illnesses. I agree that some things that we typically call mental illness are not. Should we call overeaters "mentally ill"? I think not. Should we call people who take longer than a month to grieve "mentally ill"? I think not. Should we call children who are disruptive and rebellious "oppositionally defiant"? I wonder about that. Should we call pedophiles "mentally ill" people and treat their lust for children as illness? Hmmmm. It has been estimated that fifty percent of us would be classified as mentally ill, under the current DSM, if we took psychological testing. It is true that the Bible knows nothing of mental illnesses, but the Bible was written before modern science findings, certainly before behavioral science. Does everyone with atypical or extreme personalities have "personality disorders"? We have to admit that psychology is an inexact science and based on subjective observation of behavior, making it vulnerable to criticism by cynics and critics.

How We can Be Part of the Solution

There is no excuse for that co-pilot lying, by omission, about his mental health. Still, reduction of the stigma of depression of mental illness may have identified him so he would have disclosed his situation and have never been able to fly and end the lives of 150 people, including himself. I hate it when these type of stories make headlines, though I know they have to do so, to protect the public and raise awareness. But we can all help and be part of the solution. We can educate ourselves about mental illness, depression, and suicide. We can support nonprofits like Suicide Prevention Lifeline, which serves suicidal people in much of the developed world. We can volunteer for a suicide hotline. We can reach out to people in our lives who may be depressed or suicidal. And if we have faced depression, mental illness, or depression in our lives, we can share our stories. And we can reach out to the Lifeline whose number was presented at the above banner, or refer other people in crisis to it.

This banner is provided by The Suicide Prevention Lifeline, which you can find here.

Depression and Suicide

     Suicide. It seems to be seen as an answer by more and more people as the solution to life's problems. Suicide has always been with us but it seems that more and more people, of all ages, think of or actually turn to suicide as the answer to their problems. Now don't get me wrong. I'm the first to concede that life is often difficult, sad, confusing, disappointing and plain no fun. It doesn't always seem to be worth it. When we feel like that, it is easy to lose the will to live and become depressed. And by depression I don't mean just having a bad day and having "the blues." We all feel that way sometimes. And, when sad things happen, like the loss of loved ones, jobs or other losses, it is normal to feel grief and sadness. The depression I'm talking about here is when people lose interest in living and in the things they normally enjoy and their daily functioning is hindered; it is related to other mental health or mood disorders (and some personality disorders).
     One day, months ago on my Facebook Newsfeed, a post directed me to a link; I visited the news story, which covers a young girl who was found to have hung herself. According to the report, there were no outward events in this girl's life that would have motivated her to end her life. She never reported ever having been bullied, to her parents or to her teachers. According to the report, she was a loner and, though asked to share what was bothering her, she never did. This makes me want to cry out, Why? Why? Why? Will her family ever find answers? I can only hope and pray that a thorough investigation will be done that will uncover what would drive another young girl to end her life in this fashion. Though her parents blame bullying, there is no evidence. But whatever actually gave her the motive to end it all, it was something that was real to her.
     Depression, if left untreated or unaddressed, can lead to suicide. I know that many people think that they know how to handle depressed people and that if they can motivate such individuals to "behave their way" out of it, then their depression will "lift." They will "snap out of" it. What are some of the things often said to even deeply depressed people?
     "Get over it."
     "Think positive thoughts."
     "Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Others have problems."
     "What do YOU have to be depressed about?"
     "Be thankful for what you have."
     "Shame on you for being depressed. If you keep complaining, God will give you something to really cry about."
     "Mind over matter. Tell yourself you're not depressed and good feelings will soon follow."
     "Count your blessings."
     "Think about others' problems. There are others who are less fortunate than you."
     "Think about the starving children in Africa and your depression will vanish."
     "Help others and you will forget about yourself."
     "Chin up: Others don't want to hear about your problems. They have their own."
     "Life sucks. Forget about it and move on."
     "Oh, it isn't so bad; stop being so negative or thin-skinned."
     "Stop talking like that! You know you don't mean it; I don't want to hear it."
     "You think about yourself too much; get busy and you won't have time to get depressed."
     "Oh, things CAN'T be THAT bad!"
     "Have faith and pray. Christians in God's will do not yield to depression."
     And then medication is often seen as addressing depression. In many cases, it may indeed do that. Psychiatric drugs are typically used to treat not only depression, but other mood disorders. Too often, though, I have seen that they have not helped and may even make things WORSE. As I (and my family) have learned through VERY nasty experience, drugs and drug interactions can INCREASE depression and other mental health issues! I fully sympathize with people who fully oppose ANY use of psychiatric drugs to treat depression or other mood disorders but I think they are being extreme. In many cases, good drug treatment intervention can mean the difference between being in a residential home and being fully independent, between homelessness and being employed and living a full life.
      Why is it, though, that suicide is so often being seen as the solution to suffering? Many people will blame it on social networks or on the economy, that life is just harder for people today than it was ten years ago or twenty years ago. It's true that because evildoers have more tools to work with, that their power to hurt and harm people is greater. It's true that a sagging economy does drive people to do desperate things. But, with all our awareness and talk about tolerance and openness, suicides and other tragedies are not getting better and show no signs of going away. I saw a post months ago that declared that  since this past school year  (August or September 2012) had begun, four children have already taken their lives because of school bullying. It seems that awareness, as great as it is, does not seem to be ending suicides among people of all ages.
     As I have already said, suicide has always been with us. And maybe it just SEEMS to be getting worse precisely because we are more aware of it and are hearing more and more about it when people take their lives. It has been surmised that many people, especially the young, feel that they have no where to turn, that this is even worse now because of the lack of family support. I'm sure there is a lot of truth in that. But may I suggest another factor? In past years, we had more of a fear of God and the deep-down knowledge that death is not the end, that following death we will have to stand before our Maker and give an account of every area of our lives. Many of us had it drummed into us that suicide may, indeed, be the "unpardonable sin" because there is no chance to "repent" of it following death. No, I do NOT think suicide is the "unpardonable sin" that Bible mentions, which is willfully rejecting God's forgiveness. But this fear of committing the unpardonable sin as a motivation in not ending our lives, mistaken as it was, had the fortunate effect of saving many lives! And it is forever true, that people thinking of suicide need to know: Death is not a state of nothingness and it is not the end. If we believe the Bible, upon death each of us will have to stand before our Creator and give an account of our lives. This should scare us. This is what "the fear of God" means. It is meant to drive out other fears. I don't want to sound preachy, though I know some will see it this way. It is just something to think about if we imagine that death is the end.
     One week, months ago, I had seen more suicidal posts in my Facebook Newsfeed, more talk about ending it all. It is often not easy to know how to respond to people who talk about wanting to die, especially if repeated attempts to help them seem to not to improve their outlook on life or get them to change their minds and see that life may be worth living, after all. I have seen a few posts by one such person the other day and, gathering sufficient information on this Facebook user, I brought this to the attention of the Facebook Team. However, when I logged into Facebook the following morning, I saw a couple more of such posts by this same person and followed the same steps to bring the posts to the attention of the Facebook Team. I know that others have also been reaching out to this same person and my hope is that the person will get badly needed help. In the course of time, this person had continued to post one dark post after another and, fortunately, a loyal number of Facebook users showed support, care and concern for the person. In time, the person's dark posts became less and less though she still has continued to struggle. Complicating factors included where the person lives and the laws surrounding this person's situation affecting her ability to access treatment. We are not asked the change the world or effect results beyond our control, only to do what we can and to maybe make the world better for a few people around us.
      More recently, a suicidal post streamed in my Facebook Newsfeed and it was a repost by the administrator of the said page. The post got many comments as it seemed to be a post where the person was planning to end his life. I could not find enough information on the person, including his last name or profile information. So when I brought him to Facebook's attention, I do not know what happened. I only know that the suicidal post had been removed. Recently, I have read articles or just headlines, telling of young people who have ended their lives because of bullying. Always I wonder, Will this ever end? A Facebook Ad declares, "Bullying Makes Headlines Far Too Often These Days." Why? One explanation is that life has become so cheap that too many of us see killing as a "solution to our problems." Have an unwanted pregnancy? There's abortion. Have an inconvenient relative who is impossible to live with or who cannot stand to suffer any more? There's death with dignity. So we find it easier to progress down a slippery slope. Can't stand to live with a spouse or a parent one more minute? Have them eliminated! Finally, what if I find life too much to bear? Why not just end it all? Death is more attractive than life.
     I remember, once, hearing that the people group who are least likely to experience depression are the Amish. The Amish people, as most of us know, shun much of modern life as a matter of their religious faith. They, generally speaking, subscribe to old-fashioned values of following God and putting Him first in their lives, are peace-loving and "rough it," rejecting many modern conveniences. Now, I don't advocate that we adopt the Amish way of life to deal with our depression and prevent suicide. But we can learn from the Amish people, in many ways. It's true that they aren't perfect, as is indicated by a memoir by a former Amish person who has written about things done "behind closed doors" by some Amish people. In spite of their imperfections, we can learn from them, to simply life and to put first things first, God and family and to not make an idol out of technology.
     Do social networks make us more depressed or do they just bring out what is already there? I have always maintained that they are neutral and that because social networks are the people that are behind them, that they bring things out in us. There is indeed such a thing as "Facebook depression" and the main reason we experience it is not the social network itself, but the people who are behind it. I know that there is a popular banner that says: "If you have a problem, face it. Don't Facebook it." Another banner says: "Upset? Use your tissues, not your status update." What's the message? People on social networks are generally online to have fun and not to deal with others' problems. And then there is a sarcastic post, rather lengthy, with the message: "Breaking news: Get over it. Deal with it. Everyone has problems. Stop whining. Get over yourself." Yes, there is truth in sayings like these, but when people are truly depressed, that is not the time to say things like this. To tell people, who are hurting from the past or present traumas, to "Get over it," is simply callous and shows ignorance of the human heart. Truth be told, we don't really "get over" the past. It makes us what we are today, depending on how we work through it.
     So what should you do whether, in-person or online, a person indicates that he or she wants to end it all? I have often been confronted with such persons, both in-person and online and I know that this week will not be my last time. In my church, on the front table, are little cards bearing the classic banner and number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. It is always upsetting and scary to be confronted with someone who talks about ending it all. It make us responsible and the person's life is, in a sense, in our hands. In times like this, the ordinary rules of privacy give way to doing what is needed to get the person out of harm's way, even if it means calling local authorities at 9-1-1 or contacting a suicide hotline. And what if you yourself are the one having suicidal thoughts? As one who is encountering and hearing about suicidal people, more and more, I have to provide resources for you, for this means that you are possibly dealing with more of it also.
     Suicide, like other human problems, is everyone's business.
    
    
The Suicide Prevention LifeLine This is the comprehensive website for a nonprofit that is dedicated to the awareness of and prevention of suicide among people of all ages and from all walks of life. Upon visiting the site, a suicidal person will find a live chat feature that has daytime hours. There are helpful links to other resources, all over the USA and other parts of the world, where people can turn to for suicide prevention and crisis counseling. There are links to resources where suicidal content seen on popular social networking sites can be brought to the attention of authorities, or those in charge of these social networking sites. They have a hotline that is available 24/7, with trained crisis counselors:
1-800-273-TALK (8255).

http://facebook.com/help/?faq=103883219702654
This is Facebook's comprehensive list of resources, inside and outside the USA, that deal with suicide awareness and prevention and provide practical help for persons in crisis in their local areas.

http://www.facebook.com/facebook.com/help/contact/?id=305410456169423&refid=22
This is the form where we bring to the Facebook Team information about suicidal content that we see posted on Facebook.
                                                   Photo courtesy of The Suicide Prevention LifeLine

Depression and Suicide

     Suicide. It seems to be seen as an answer by more and more people as the solution to life's problems. Suicide has always been with us but it seems that more and more people, of all ages, think of or actually turn to suicide as the answer to their problems. Now don't get me wrong. I'm the first to concede that life is often difficult, sad, confusing, disappointing and plain no fun. It doesn't always seem to be worth it. When we feel like that, it is easy to lose the will to live and become depressed. And by depression I don't mean just having a bad day and having "the blues." We all feel that way sometimes. And, when sad things happen, like the loss of loved ones, jobs or other losses, it is normal to feel grief and sadness. The depression I'm talking about here is when people lose interest in living and in the things they normally enjoy and their daily functioning is hindered; it is related to other mental health or mood disorders (and some personality disorders).
     Today, a post directed me to a link; I visited the news story, which covers a young girl who was found to have hung herself. According to the report, there were no outward events in this girl's life that would have motivated her to end her life. She never reported ever having been bullied, to her parents or to her teachers. According to the report, she was a loner and, though asked to share what was bothering her, she never did. This makes me want to cry out, Why? Why? Why? Will her family ever find answers? I can only hope and pray that a thorough investigation will be done that will uncover what would drive another young girl to end her life in this fashion. Though her parents blame bullying, there is no evidence. But whatever actually gave her the motive to end it all, it was something that was real to her.
     Depression, if left untreated or unaddressed, can lead to suicide. I know that many people think that they know how to handle depressed people and that if they can motivate such individuals to "behave their way" out of it, then their depression will "lift." They will "snap out of" it. What are some of the things often said to even deeply depressed people?
     "Get over it."
     "Think positive thoughts."
     "Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Others have problems."
     "What do YOU have to be depressed about?"
     "Be thankful for what you have."
     "Shame on you for being depressed. If you keep complaining, God will give you something to really cry about."
     "Mind over matter. Tell yourself you're not depressed and good feelings will soon follow."
     "Count your blessings."
     "Think about others' problems. There are others who are less fortunate than you."
     "Think about the starving children in Africa and your depression will vanish."
     "Help others and you will forget about yourself."
     "Chin up: Others don't want to hear about your problems. They have their own."
     "Life sucks. Forget about it and move on."
     "Oh, it isn't so bad; stop being so negative or thin-skinned."
     "Stop talking like that! You know you don't mean it; I don't want to hear it."
     "You think about yourself too much; get busy and you won't have time to get depressed."
     "Oh, things CAN'T be THAT bad!"
     "Have faith and pray. Christians in God's will do not yield to depression."
     And then medication is often seen as addressing depression. In many cases, it may indeed do that. Psychiatric drugs are typically used to treat not only depression, but other mood disorders. Too often, though, I have seen that they have not helped and may even make things WORSE. As I (and my family) have learned through VERY nasty experience, drugs and drug interactions can INCREASE depression and other mental health issues! I fully sympathize with people who fully oppose ANY use of psychiatric drugs to treat depression or other mood disorders but I think they are being extreme. In many cases, good drug treatment intervention can mean the difference between being in a residential home and being fully independent, between homelessness and being employed and living a full life.
      Why is it, though, that suicide is so often being seen as the solution to suffering? Many people will blame it on social networks or on the economy, that life is just harder for people today than it was ten years ago or twenty years ago. It's true that because evildoers have more tools to work with, that their power to hurt and harm people is geater. It's true that a sagging economy does drive people to do desperate things. But, with all our awareness and talk about tolerance and openness, suicdes and other tragedies are not getting better and show no signs of going away. I saw a post the other day that, since this school year has begun, four children have already taken their lives because of school bullying. It seems that awareness, as great as it is, does not seem to be ending suicides among people of all ages.
     As I have already said, suicide has always been with us. And maybe it just SEEMS to be getting worse precisely because we are more aware of it and are hearing more and more about it when people take their lives. It has been surmised that many people, especially the young, feel that they have no where to turn, that this is even worse now because of the lack of family support. I'm sure there is a lot of truth in that. But may I suggest another factor? In past years, we had more of a fear of God and the deep-down knowledge that death is not the end, that following death we will have to stand before our Maker and give an account of evey area of our lives. Many of us had it drummed into us that suicide may, indeed, be the "unpardonable sin" because there is no chance to "repent" of it following death. No, I do NOT think suicide is the "unpardonable sin" that Bible mentions, which is willfully rejecting God's forgiveness. But this fear of committing the unpardonable sin as a motivation in not ending our lives, mistaken as it was, had the fortunate effect of saving many lives! And it is forever true, that people thinking of suicide need to know: Death is not a state of nothingness and it is not the end. If we believe the Bible, upon death each of us will have to stand before our Creator and give an account of our lives. This should scare us. This is what "the fear of God" means. It is meant to drive out other fears. I don't want to sound preachy, though I know some will see it this way. It is just something to think about if we imagine that death is the end.
     This past week, I have seen more suicidal posts in my Facebook Newsfeed, more talk about ending it all. It is often not easy to know how to respond to people who talk about wanting to die, especially if repeated attempts to help them seem to not to improve their outlook on life or get them to change their minds and see that life may be worth living, after all. I have seen a few posts by one such person the other day and, gathering sufficient information on this Facebook user, I brought this to the attention of the Facebook Team. However, when I logged into Facebook the following morning, I saw a couple more of such posts by this same person and followed the same steps to bring the posts to the attention of the Facebook Team. I know that others have also been reaching out to this same person and my hope is that the person will get badly needed help.
     I remember, once, hearing that the people group who are least likely to experience depression are the Amish. The Amish people, as most of us know, shun much of modern life as a metter of their religious faith. They, generally speaking, subscribe to old-fasioned values of following God and putting Him first in their lives, are peace-loving and "rough it," rejecting many modern conveniences. Now, I don't advocate that we adopt the Amish way of life to deal with our depression and prevent suicide. But we can learn from the Amish people, in many ways. It's true that they aren't perfect, as is indicated by a memoir by a former Amish person who has written about things done "behind closed doors" by some Amish people. In spite of their imprefections, we can learn from them, to simply life and to put first things first, God and family and to not make an idol out of technology.
     Do social networks make us more depressed or do they just bring out what is already there? I have always maintained that they are neutral and that because social networks are the people that are behind them, that they bring things out in us. There is indeed such a thing as "Facebook depression" and the main reason we experience it is not the social network itself, but the people who are behind it. I know that there is a popular banner that says: "If you have a problem, face it. Don't Facebook it." Another banner says: "Upset? Use your tissues, not your status update." What's the message? People on social networks are generally online to have fun and not to deal with others' problems. And then there is a sarcastic post, rather lengthy, with the message: "Breaking news: Get over it. Deal with it. Everyone has problems. Stop whining. Get over yourself." Yes, there is truth in sayings like these, but when people are truly depressed, that is not the time to say things like this. To tell people, who are hurting from the past or present traumas, to "Get over it," is simply callous and shows ignorance of the human heart. Truth be told, we don't really "get over" the past. It makes us what we are today, depending on how we work through it.
     So what should you do whether, in-person or online, a person indicates that he or she wants to end it all? I have often been confronted with such persons, both in-person and online and I know that this week will not be my last time. In my church, on the front table, are little cards bearing the classic banner and number for the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline. It is always upsetting and scary to be confronted with someone who talks about ending it all. It make us responsible and the person's life is, in a sense, in our hands. In times like this, the ordinary rules of privacy give way to doing what is needed to get the person out of harm's way, even if it meams calling local authorities at 9-1-1 or contacting a suicide hotline. And what if you yourself are the one having suicidal thoughts? As one who is encountering and hearing about suicidal people, more and more, I have to provide resources for you, for this means that you are possibly dealing with more of it also.
     Suicide, like other human problems, is everyone's business.
    
    
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
This is the comprehensive website for a nonprofit that is dedicated to the awareness of and prevention of suicide among people of all ages and from all walks of life. Upon visiting the site, a suicidal person will find a live chat feature that has daytime hours. There are helpful links to other resources, all over the USA and other parts of the world, where people can turn to for suicide prevention and crisis counseling. There are links to resources where suicidal content seen on populat social networking sites can be brought to the attention of authorities, or those in charge of these social networking sites. They have a hotline that is available 24/7, with trained crisis counselors:
1-800-273-TALK (8255).

http://facebook.com/help/?faq=103883219702654
This is Facebook's comprehensive list of resources, inside and outside the USA, that deal with suicide awareness and prevention and provide practical help for persons in crisis in their local areas.

http://www.facebook.com/facebook.com/help/contact/?id=305410456169423&refid=22
This is the form where we bring to the Facebook Team information about suicidal content that we see posted on Facebook.

Depression

         "Have faith in God and seek Him and you won't fall into depression."         "Get over it."
         "Just look at the glass being half-full instead of half-empty."
         "Think positive not negative thoughts."
         "Stop feeling sorry for yourself; others have problems."
         "What do you have to be depressed about: look at the GOOD THINGS you enjoy...."
         "It's not a big deal; blow it off."
         "Cheer up; relax and keep a cheerful attitude."
         "Be thankful for what you have and you'll feel better."
         "Shame on you for being depressed; God will give you something to be REALLY depressed about if you carry on like you are."
          "Look at....; this person is facing worse problems than you and this person is not depressed."
          "Mind over matter. Tell yourself you're not depressed and good feelings will follow."
          "Count all your blessings and you'll see that you have no reason to feel depressed."
          "You are not the only person in the world with problems; things are tough all around for most people. Someone is always worse off than you."
           "Think about the starving, the terminally ill, the disabled, the homeless, and anyone else facing worse problems than you; get your eyes off yourself and focus on others' needs."
           "Depressed? Get off your duff and help others."
           "Chin up. Others don't want to hear about your problems because they have their own."
           "Life sucks. Chalk it up and move on."
           "He is a scumbag anyway; he is not worth your tears."
           "Snap out of it."
           "It isn't that bad; stop thinking about it and let it it go."
           "Have faith in God and pray; it is not God's will for His people to live in depression."
           "Depression is an attack of the devil; rebuke this depression demon and it will leave you."
           "Christians should always be happy because God has blessed us. What is wrong with you?"
           These are just examples of the many things people typically say to those who are dealing with depression. I have heard them said over and over to depressed people in my life. Though I try not to say things like this that minimize people's depression, I'm sure I have. Many of thse things are said to depressed people because few people want to deal with depressed people and their feelings and want to see the depression stop. Many, even most, of these things, are said to depressed people in order to relieve the speaker's discomfort with seeing that another is depressed. And often, those who say these things simply don't want to hear how bad someone else is feeling. Yes, there is some truth in many of these sayings. We should help and serve others. We should thank God for blessing us with what He has. We sould trust Him with our problems and pray. We should have empathy for others both near and far and care for the less fortunate to the best of our ability. Yes, we should do these things.
          When I write about depression I'm not talking about the common "blues" that all of us experience when our moods go awry or we are having a bad day. Nor am I talking about grief, the "normal" reaction to loss and which lessens with time. I'm talking about depression experienced on a level that interferes with the depressed person's daily and basic functioning, such as relating to one's family and friends, the ability to focus on what one needs to do, the will to attend to one's responsibilities and even the will to live. I'm writing about the depression where a person loses interest in things formerly and normally loved and enjoyed, including family and friends, eating, hobbies, grooming,  and other normal pursuits. This kind of depression can't be wished away, ignored and people can't be admonished to behave their way out of this.
          I know this by experience. Depression isn't just caused by stressful outside circumstances but by things like chemical inbalances, medicine side effects, hormones, one's personality type and more. And as a person of faith, I do believe in a personal devil and that he can attack people by bringing spells of depression on them. Since early childhood, since being diagnosed with epilepsy, I have taken anti-convulsants. These anticonvulsants that are meant to control seizures carry major side effects altering one's mental faculties, including memory, focus, processing speed, sex drive, reflexes, moods and more. Most thankful that Depakote that I take has kept me seizure-free for over 12 years, I continue to experience all the side effects mentioned, more or less. This med has solved one medical problem while creating others, including depression spells. Yes, I know (and am reminded by family) that my side effects, miserable as they are, are the lesser of two evils, which is uncontrolled seizures. Yet long-term use of anti-convulsants have given me, in effect, a chemical lobotomy (as opposed to the surgical ones that used to be done to people). Especially since I'm a mom, I have been told, when I reveal or express depression, "You can't be depressed. Remember, you have a daughter and you're supposed to put her first," "If being depressed is causing you to neglect your daughter, get over it," and "At least you're not homeless, etc., etc.." I guess this is the natural response to depression because
we want to feel good and we want others to feel good; this way life will be easier for us all, yes?
          Stressful circumstances commonly serve as triggers even if depression has biological causes. This is know very well. Most of my depression spells are triggered by stressful events, immediately following such events. Also, depression is often caused by issues in life that one needs to address, especially if one feels powerless to do so because of finances or other people. Currently, I'm experiencing a spell of depression which has been triggered by a major falling-out I have had with a person online, and by my distress over my lack of access to getting an autism spectrum evaluation which could provide definitive answers as to why my life has taken the twists and turns it has.
          Yesterday, when I was scrolling through my homepage to see what was going on, I saw a post by a Facebook user who was despondent and revealed that he felt worthless, hurting and a loser, because a girlfriend had rejected him. A user posted in the comment section underneath his status, "Chin up." Another Facebook user said, "Stop feeling sorry for yourself; other people have problems also." I posted a more empathic response. These kinds of responses to people (mostly women) who share their depressed feelings on Facebook, is empathy, caring, compassion and "cyber-hugs." In most of these cases, the sharers have been women and their supporters have also usually been women. Yes, I think that some of the depressed posts have been overdone and come off as attention-getting rather than genuine. A number of  people on my page seem to use social networking solely to vent their bad feelings, whether stemming from bad circumstances or mental health conditions, and to seek support from others.
          My research and experience tell me that people on the autism spectrum, especially teens and adults, get depressed often. And no wonder. For autism spectrum disorders, by their very nature, make people vulnerable to misunderstanding and being misunderstood. When you constantly suffer from difficult human relationships because people don't "get" you and you don't "get" them and they don't accept you as a differently-wired person but equally valuable, depression is almost unavoidable. Depression is probably experienced by many others who have other invisible disabilities for many of the same reasons.
          The stigma of depression has lessened, thanks to brave, high-profile people who have "gone public" with their depression experiences. But the stigma remains and it is worst religious circles where the expectation is that faith will make and keep us always happy, or should. In the Christian Church, it has traditionally been seen as as moral weakness, a sign of weak faith, or even a sin. Depression may not be a sin or a moral weakness but how we react to it and handle it can lead to doing bad things. And depressed people who would benefit from medicine or other treatments should, if possible, do what they can to seek medical treatment (yes I know that anti-depressants can have very bad side effects and are not for many people).
          "Jesus wept," the Bible tells us. "He was a man of sorrows and acquainted with grief." Do I need to add anything to that?