I followed the televised Florida court case of the State of Florida vs. George Zimmerman. I did this beginning with the selection of six jurors, five whom I later realized were moms, five who were Caucasians and one who was of "an unknown minority." They were trying Zimmerman for taking your life over a year ago when you were walking into a gated community one evening, to visit your dad. You were barely 17 years old when you were shot in the heart and your life was snuffed out. Your killer claimed self-defense, even claiming that you brutally attacked him and left him with no option but to defend himself from your vicious attack. Your killer even claimed that you made a weapon of the concrete sidewalk and used it to bash his head, over and over and over. When I learned of the demographic of the six jurors, I did not know what to think. You were Black and most of them were Caucasian; it is unclear what minority the sixth juror was. I know that there are many people who declare that the case against your killer had nothing to do with race. The Judge in the second-degree murder case against your killer would not permit any racial debate to enter into the trial. That meant that she ruled against the many calls your killer made to the authorities that involved Black people, especially teens like you. Your killer was what we often call "a wanna-be cop" who was zealous about fighting crime in his gated community. There is nothing wrong with wanting to fight crime and being the eyes and ears for his law enforcement (LE). But when this person seemed to focus his suspicions on the Black community and went so far as to end your life that rainy evening, I question his motives and especially his attitude toward the Black community.
The case against your killer would never even have led to him being arrested for his actions that rainy night, had some 2,500,000 plus of us had not signed a Change.org petition. Your killer would never have been placed in police custody had many individuals not staged peaceful protests calling for your killer to face charges for ending your life that rainy night. The recent trial would never had happened! The trial? Your killer sat in there, day after day, looking smug and sure that he would be set free. I saw your parents in the front row and I saw them and your older brother when each of them was called to testify. I saw their amazing grace, strength, dignity and courage throughout the entire trial. This spoke much about what kind of family you came from and what kind of kid you very possibly were. We saw you, in court and certainly in the media, maligned as a violent "thug" and a "scary kid." In the media, those of us who use social networks read articles where you were portrayed as a troubled teenager who used drugs, was aggressive and a "gang-wanna-be." Articles surfaced that you were trying to buy a firearm. An app was created called "Angry Trayvon" that was a game. So many of us angrily reported this app that it was recalled. Your killer's supporters went to great lengths to make sure that we saw you in the worst light possible. Even if there is some truth to these rumors that have circulated about you, you were a teenager and a victim. Your killer was the adult and the "neighborhood watch co-ordinator" who should have known better.
It is disheartening how the case against your killer has so bitterly divided a nation and led to so many ill feelings and expressions of hate and rage. This divide has been roughly along racial and political lines. People who have supported your killer claim that the case against your killer has nothing to do with race. But is this true? Your killer was known to make many phone calls to authorities involving Blacks. I heard that 911 tape, over and over. Your killer described you as a "suspicious person" and also called you a "suspect." He used expletives so bad that they were bleeped out. He made racial slurs and declared that "they always get away." He described you as "walking slowly." You were "suspicious" because you were wearing a hoodie and were of the skin color that your killer apparently did not trust. So many people who support your killer claim that there "is no evidence" that you were a victim of crime or that your homicide was unjustifiable. Nor that you were racially profiled. They point to the fact that your killer mentioned your race only when he was asked by the Dispatcher who took the call, that you supposedly appeared out of nowhere to viciously attack your killer , and that your killer was a good man and neighbor who "would never do such a thing unless he had no choice." Your supporters have held that you were racially profiled and base this on the 911 tape and on the prior 911 calls made by your killer, that involved suspected young Blacks, that you were defending yourself with your fists and that you were a victim. As for one Defense witness choice, I was dismayed at the choice of the young mom, Olivia, who testified at your killer's trial that her home had been invaded by two Black teenagers and that she had understandably feared for her life and that of her children. She testified that your killer had helped her and showed her caring. To me, this sent the jury (and the listening public) a silent message about how young Black people are often seen as scary and "guilty until proven innocent." This is only ONE EXAMPLE of many, many such.
Throughout the trial itself, your killer was humanized and the Defense selected many witnesses who spoke glowingly of your killer and what he meant to them. Your killer sat in court, day after day and the six ladies who were to decide his fate, got many chances to bond with him and see him as a real, flesh and blood person. We kept seeing the wounds on the back of your killer's head and on his nose. The six-women jury kept seeing those photos. Your heartbreaking autopsy photos, on the other hand, seemed to have been shown less to the jury. In court, your mom, dad and brother did testify in your behalf. But the State did not call anyone as "character witnesses" to speak of who you were, as the Defense did for your killer. I was saddened that the "star witness" for the State," your friend Rachel, was trashed by so many people on the two days that she testified. She did say how you mentioned that you felt that you were being stalked by a "creepy ass cracker" and at one point, begged your killer to "Get off of me, get off!" She spoke to you minutes before you were killed. On social media and the Internet, people vilified Rachel because of her physical appearance and because of how she spoke. She was criticized because she admitted to lying in a court deposition, about her age and why she could not bring herself to attend your funeral. Overall, though, it seems that your case was doomed from the very beginning, since you were found dead on the grass that terrible night. The LE believed your killer's account of justifiable self-defense and dropped initial charges against him. You were not properly identified, An initial investigation was not properly done and crucial evidence that could have brought your killer were lost forever. Sadly, the State, therefore, was not able to put on your case as they would have liked and in a way that would have brought your killer to justice. The jury selection consisted of a non-diverse group of women except for a woman of unknown minority.
Last Saturday night, we heard the verdict, which only deepened the bitter divide that has exist over the case from the beginning. I had been feeling positive and hopeful when the jury had brought the Judge a question concerning the lesser charge of Manslaughter. However, when about an hour later, the verdict was quickly read. Your parents, who had been there daily as their show of support for you, did not show up at the reading of the controversial verdict. When I heard the "Not Guilty" verdict that set your killer totally free, with all his liberties restored to him, like so many others, I was profoundly affected. Your killer did not even get Manslaughter, much less Second-Degree Murder. As a result, there are peaceful protests all over the US. I understand that "Justice4YTrayvon" vigils are to be held in 100 cities, all over the US tomorrow alone. Over a million of us have signed a Change.org petition calling on the Justice Department to investigate your case and to see if your killer can have hate crimes charges brought against him. The Attorney General, Eric Holder, is now looking into this matter and your killer's gun, used to end your life, has been turned over to them. Yes, there have been some race riots but for the most part, people have been said to be peaceful. I saw your parents interviewed yesterday and again, they have shown the same strength, dignity, grace and courage they showed throughout the entire trial.
Your killer? He may be innocent in the eyes of the law. He may be free in the legal sense. But free emotionally, spiritually, or even physically? No. Many, many expressions of anger, ill will and hate have been expressed all over the Internet and on social networks. He, his family and those on his legal team have received death threats and they are said to be many, coming in daily. I saw a Facebook page set up called, "I Hate George Zimmerman." A Black group has set up a $10,000 bounty to capture your killer, to "get him." So your killer remains guilty in the eyes of many in the public and this will be unlikely to ever change. Your tragic, untimely young death has sparked many national conversations about race relations, gun laws, the inequities in the criminal justice system and the need to prevent violence in our neighborhoods. So while a Florida jury of six women have set your killer free, have stated that your death is a justifiable homicide, and that you were not a mere victim but were responsible for your death, they do not have the last word. Your parents are committed to devoting the rest of their lives to preventing and ending violence, in your name and in your honor. Many people are calling for changes in some of our gun laws that made it almost impossible to convict your killer of any crime in your tragic death. People see you as a symbol of the inequities in the criminal justice system and many bad attitudes that are rampant throughout our society, toward anyone who looks, walks, talks or acts differently and is more likely to be seen as "suspicious" and a "danger to society."
Rest in peace, Trayvon. You have not died in vain.
Showing posts with label Murder. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Murder. Show all posts
Friday, July 19, 2013
Friday, July 12, 2013
The Trial That Is Dividing A Nation
There is a case and a trial, currently in its final stages. It involves a deceased 17 year old teenager and the man charged with second-degree murder in his death. Each one of us who knows anything about this case, and especially if we follow it, have strong emotions about it and what we think happened. This case has spawned demonstrations and peaceful protests all over the US. It has inspired a Change.org petition which over 2,500,000 people signed. This petition was to the Florida Attorney General to charge the defendant in this case with murder in the death of an unarmed teenager that he shot. The defendant, from the very beginning, has claimed self-defense under the "Stand Your Ground" law in the State of Florida. The defendant was the Neighborhood Watch volunteer and the eyes and ears of his neighborhood. One rainy, dark night, a 17 year old boy was walking through this neighborhood, with headphones, Skittles, iced tea and his cell phone. The defendant, who carried a gun and a flashlight, contacted Law Enforcement (LE) about this teenager, got out of his vehicle and, in the course of time, a fight began. It is unclear what happened during this fight. It is clear that the teenager involved is dead and that his killer, who shot him in the heart, is claiming self-defense, as a result of what happened in the course of this fight.
This case would not ever have become a case unless there had been nationwide protests and millions of signatures on a Change.org petition. All of this was a result of anger that the defendant in this case was not even arrested or charged with any crime, because LE believed his story about self-defense. Why is there so much passion surrounding the case of Trayvon Martin, the shooting victim, and George Zimmerman, the shooter? I know that many want to pretend that this case has nothing to do with race, but it would be intellectually dishonest to pretend that. The Judge in this case has omitted racial profiling in putting forth evidence in this case. But of course race is a HUGE part of this debate! This is because, frankly, the shooting victim was Black and the shooter is Hispanic-Caucasian. We know that the criminal justice system, with its many flaws, has failed the Black community. Studies show that Blacks are overrepresented in our prisons and jails, in proportion to their numbers. I may be wrong, but it is unknown that there is one Caucasian defendant who has been sent to Death Row for murdering a Black person. Yet there are quite a few Black people on Death Row. We have to face the fact that had George Zimmerman been Black and Trayvon had been a Caucasian teenager, we would not have this kind of passionate debate on this case. Zimmerman would have been arrested and that without nationwide protests or a petition with millions of signatures on it. The defendant's charges may have even been first-degree, not second-degree murder. Let's face it. We have a Black US President but racism is far from dead. We have made much progress, as we have in so many things, but we have far to go.
Last year, President Obama was heard to with in on Trayvon Martin and ended with, "If I had a son, he would have looked like Trayvon." I have read posts that suggest the President was trying to influence the outcome of this case, or intended to stir up racial unrest. I have no way of knowing what was going on in the President's mind when he made those comments. Because of the racial factor in this case but also because of the gun debate (Stand Your Ground in the State of Florida), this has been a very divisive case. Those who support Trayvon tend to be Black, tend to be child advocates, more likely to have been crime victims, and often have known some form of discrimination or marginalization. Many are simply people of good will. People who tend to support George Zimmerman tend to be Caucasian, may have had bad experiences with the Black community, tend to be Establishment people, often identify with LE, or are advocate for gun rights. Many just think, for their own reasons, that George Zimmerman acted in self-defense and is a victim of an angry teenager who attacked him. This case is unlike the Jodi Arias trial where the public overwhelmingly support Travis Alexander and opposed Jodi and most people have been sure of that defendant's guilt. There was no racial element in that trial, as both the victim and the defendant are Caucasian. However, in this Trayvon/George Zimmerman case, we clearly are split on this case and it may be reflected in the jury's verdict which may likely end up in a mistrial.
I have followed the trial on cable TV and have been struck by the expressions of hate and bullying that I have seen in one comment after another, both on Facebook and on the Internet. What is the cause of so much of this online bullying and hate? I have read many libelous articles. Some Trayvon Martin supporters have posted articles that expose George Zimmerman's past. These articles have included instances where Zimmerman molested a girl for many years and told her that it was "our secret." The Prosecution was denied permission to bring in elements from Zimmerman's past, such as when he assaulted an off-duty police officer and another time when he assaulted an ex-girlfriend (s?) and she got a restraining order against him. I have heard somewhere that Zimmerman had to go to anger management classes. The George Zimmerman supporters have made a big deal of Trayvon's marijuana usage, a past history of fighting and I read an article claiming that Trayvon had a history of burglary. I am not going to go into the name-calling on both sides as many of the names are not fit to be put in print. But I find it very offensive to trash murder victims the way that Trayvon has been trashed, complete with name-calling and libelous articles and comments. I know that victims are often trashed in trials as a part of defending criminal defendants. It was done in the Jodi Arias trial, where the defense brought forth accusations that Travis was abusive and a pedophile who was a sexual deviant. In the Casey Anthony trial, the defense brought forth molestation accusations against Casey's father George Anthony. And so on and on. But the victim trashing seems especially vicious in this George Zimmerman trial because of the very way the defendant is being tried for whether his shooting of Trayvon was justifiable self-defense or second-degree murder (or manslaughter). This of course implies that if you believe that Zimmerman is not guilty, that Trayvon caused his own death.
Emotions are running very high. Much hinges on the outcome of this trial, not only for Trayvon Martin's family and for George Zimmerman and his family, but how the justice system will handle other murder cases where self-defense is the defense. The outcome of this trial may cause racial unrest, if not racially-motivated violence and will certainly affect the public's view of the justice system. I suspect the outcome of this trial will affect the rate at which violent offenders will claim self-defense. The tension of the two sides, the supporters of Trayvon Martin and the supporters of George Zimmerman, is profound. We have two worldviews, one that leans more toward the life of the victim and the other worldview, that which values more the right to defend oneself. As I write this, the Zimmerman jury is now deliberating his guilt (or lack of it).
If we have basic knowledge of this case, we have strong and passionate feelings either for Trayvon or for George Zimmerman. It depends on our worldviews that come from our own values and life experiences. But there are facts in this case with which no person can disagree. One person is dead. His life was cut off at the age of 17. He was a teenager who was Black. He was 5'11 and 158 pounds. He was shot in the heart with a firearm. The defendant is the volunteer co-ordinator of a Neighborhood Watch in his community. He was driving in a vehicle. He had a flashlight and a gun. He is 5'8 and was 204 pounds (at the time). He made a 911 call expressing suspicion of the victim, his conversation laced with profanity. His statements to LE are laden with inconsistencies. He caused the untimely death of an unarmed teenager. He claims lawful self-defense. His life, the lives of his family and the lives of the victim's family are forever scarred by his actions on that rainy and dark night. The jury verdict will have a profound emotional impact on an entire nation.
Whatever the Zimmerman jury decides, my hope is that we will use all this to work together to change hearts, which cause what comes out of our mouths and what we do.
This case would not ever have become a case unless there had been nationwide protests and millions of signatures on a Change.org petition. All of this was a result of anger that the defendant in this case was not even arrested or charged with any crime, because LE believed his story about self-defense. Why is there so much passion surrounding the case of Trayvon Martin, the shooting victim, and George Zimmerman, the shooter? I know that many want to pretend that this case has nothing to do with race, but it would be intellectually dishonest to pretend that. The Judge in this case has omitted racial profiling in putting forth evidence in this case. But of course race is a HUGE part of this debate! This is because, frankly, the shooting victim was Black and the shooter is Hispanic-Caucasian. We know that the criminal justice system, with its many flaws, has failed the Black community. Studies show that Blacks are overrepresented in our prisons and jails, in proportion to their numbers. I may be wrong, but it is unknown that there is one Caucasian defendant who has been sent to Death Row for murdering a Black person. Yet there are quite a few Black people on Death Row. We have to face the fact that had George Zimmerman been Black and Trayvon had been a Caucasian teenager, we would not have this kind of passionate debate on this case. Zimmerman would have been arrested and that without nationwide protests or a petition with millions of signatures on it. The defendant's charges may have even been first-degree, not second-degree murder. Let's face it. We have a Black US President but racism is far from dead. We have made much progress, as we have in so many things, but we have far to go.
Last year, President Obama was heard to with in on Trayvon Martin and ended with, "If I had a son, he would have looked like Trayvon." I have read posts that suggest the President was trying to influence the outcome of this case, or intended to stir up racial unrest. I have no way of knowing what was going on in the President's mind when he made those comments. Because of the racial factor in this case but also because of the gun debate (Stand Your Ground in the State of Florida), this has been a very divisive case. Those who support Trayvon tend to be Black, tend to be child advocates, more likely to have been crime victims, and often have known some form of discrimination or marginalization. Many are simply people of good will. People who tend to support George Zimmerman tend to be Caucasian, may have had bad experiences with the Black community, tend to be Establishment people, often identify with LE, or are advocate for gun rights. Many just think, for their own reasons, that George Zimmerman acted in self-defense and is a victim of an angry teenager who attacked him. This case is unlike the Jodi Arias trial where the public overwhelmingly support Travis Alexander and opposed Jodi and most people have been sure of that defendant's guilt. There was no racial element in that trial, as both the victim and the defendant are Caucasian. However, in this Trayvon/George Zimmerman case, we clearly are split on this case and it may be reflected in the jury's verdict which may likely end up in a mistrial.
I have followed the trial on cable TV and have been struck by the expressions of hate and bullying that I have seen in one comment after another, both on Facebook and on the Internet. What is the cause of so much of this online bullying and hate? I have read many libelous articles. Some Trayvon Martin supporters have posted articles that expose George Zimmerman's past. These articles have included instances where Zimmerman molested a girl for many years and told her that it was "our secret." The Prosecution was denied permission to bring in elements from Zimmerman's past, such as when he assaulted an off-duty police officer and another time when he assaulted an ex-girlfriend (s?) and she got a restraining order against him. I have heard somewhere that Zimmerman had to go to anger management classes. The George Zimmerman supporters have made a big deal of Trayvon's marijuana usage, a past history of fighting and I read an article claiming that Trayvon had a history of burglary. I am not going to go into the name-calling on both sides as many of the names are not fit to be put in print. But I find it very offensive to trash murder victims the way that Trayvon has been trashed, complete with name-calling and libelous articles and comments. I know that victims are often trashed in trials as a part of defending criminal defendants. It was done in the Jodi Arias trial, where the defense brought forth accusations that Travis was abusive and a pedophile who was a sexual deviant. In the Casey Anthony trial, the defense brought forth molestation accusations against Casey's father George Anthony. And so on and on. But the victim trashing seems especially vicious in this George Zimmerman trial because of the very way the defendant is being tried for whether his shooting of Trayvon was justifiable self-defense or second-degree murder (or manslaughter). This of course implies that if you believe that Zimmerman is not guilty, that Trayvon caused his own death.
Emotions are running very high. Much hinges on the outcome of this trial, not only for Trayvon Martin's family and for George Zimmerman and his family, but how the justice system will handle other murder cases where self-defense is the defense. The outcome of this trial may cause racial unrest, if not racially-motivated violence and will certainly affect the public's view of the justice system. I suspect the outcome of this trial will affect the rate at which violent offenders will claim self-defense. The tension of the two sides, the supporters of Trayvon Martin and the supporters of George Zimmerman, is profound. We have two worldviews, one that leans more toward the life of the victim and the other worldview, that which values more the right to defend oneself. As I write this, the Zimmerman jury is now deliberating his guilt (or lack of it).
If we have basic knowledge of this case, we have strong and passionate feelings either for Trayvon or for George Zimmerman. It depends on our worldviews that come from our own values and life experiences. But there are facts in this case with which no person can disagree. One person is dead. His life was cut off at the age of 17. He was a teenager who was Black. He was 5'11 and 158 pounds. He was shot in the heart with a firearm. The defendant is the volunteer co-ordinator of a Neighborhood Watch in his community. He was driving in a vehicle. He had a flashlight and a gun. He is 5'8 and was 204 pounds (at the time). He made a 911 call expressing suspicion of the victim, his conversation laced with profanity. His statements to LE are laden with inconsistencies. He caused the untimely death of an unarmed teenager. He claims lawful self-defense. His life, the lives of his family and the lives of the victim's family are forever scarred by his actions on that rainy and dark night. The jury verdict will have a profound emotional impact on an entire nation.
Whatever the Zimmerman jury decides, my hope is that we will use all this to work together to change hearts, which cause what comes out of our mouths and what we do.
Friday, May 10, 2013
The Case That Is Fascinating Us
A number of months ago, a talented and attractive woman, accused of a savage murder, was on trial for her life. Her trial has been televised for the entire US to see. In being exposed to her trial on HLN, by default I found myself becoming gradually fascinated by her case. As with other cases that have captured national headlines, this case had salacious sex and scandal attached to it. In this defendant's trial, we who have followed this case have repeatedly heard a sex tape with racy, torrid content. We have heard witnesses who have had to testify of their intimate sexual experiences with the murder victim. We have heard the accused murderess tell lie after lie after lie and actually blame her victim for all her actions. She has cheapened the words abuse, domestic violence and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) by applying them to her experience without evidence. She even accused her victim of being a pedophile! Many of us have have witnessed the dirty, dishonest and often deliberate stalling tactics by this defendant's defense team. We have seen the heartbreak of the victim's family as they have been re-victimized again and again. They have had to hear their loved one be trashed by the defense and the defendant. They have had to hear about and see the gruesome autopsy photos reminding them (as if they need reminding) of the extremely cruel was their brother and loved one died. All of us, who have our own stories and who have followed this trial, have often been angered, disgusted and outraged by all this. So many people have been so obsessed by this trial that they have travelled out of state to visit the courthouse in Arizona. Especially around verdict time. This past Wednesday, May 8, this defendant was convicted. Her sentencing has still not been determined.
Why are we so fascinated, even obsessed, by this one case? Why are so many of us living through it and following every detail of this particular case? I'm sure most people know that I'm talking about the death penalty murder case of the State of Arizona vs. Jodie Arias. I'm sure that for many it is because of the extremely brutal way that the victim, Travis Alexander, died. He was stabbed 29 times and in places that were documented as "incompatible with survival." He was slit in the throat from ear to ear. He was shot in the head. Killed three ways. Either of these ways would have killed him. He SUFFERED when he was murdered, which was documented by the prosecution medical expert witness. Travis did not "go fast" and his murder did not happen quickly, like a mere shot in the head that would have of itself have killed him. His murder has deeply affected many of us. Many have been interested in this trial because they can identify with Travis's family through losing loved ones to murder or maybe they themselves survived attacks that had some features to Travis's murder. For all of you I'm certain this trial has been very triggering. Many people, in the US and worldwide, have been fascinated by this trial because, frankly, they have lived through it and found it a distraction from painful realities in their own lives. I have seen how so many of us are familiar with all the key players in this trial. Juan Martinez. I have seen one Facebook post or comment after another by "fans" of Juan who have proclaimed their near-worship of him. I have even seen posts by some asking about Juan's marital status! And Juan "fans" have been calling for Juan to become a State Governor or Judge! I'm seeing on Facebook and hearing in real life curses and slurs for the defense team, including Jennifer Wilmot and Curt Nurmi, as well as the defense witnesses. Not to mention death threats.
Yes, I know that there was equal and maybe even more intense obsession with the Casey Anthony case. I will never forget the national outrage, petitions, Facebook pages, Facebook "events" and countless storm of protests that erupted when Casey was acquitted of any involvement in the death of her small daughter, Caylee. What we do not realize, or forget, is that every day, there are countless other crime cases, including murder cases that happen all over the US or anywhere outside the US. Yet we have never heard of them; if we have, we do not take much interest in them. Why do certain cases grip our national and even worldwide attention? Why do so many of us live through them? Even taking off our jobs and spending time and money to travel to a courthouse? Even though we do not know the people involved in the fascinating case? To top it off, Miss Arias, AFTER her conviction, actually gave an interview on TV! A day later, we learn that she is placed in a psychiatric ward and is declared "incompetent." It seems that even as so many of us are outraged at not only the savage crime of Jodie, but also are equally outraged at her spiteful, deceitful and manipulative conduct afterward and up to present. Yes, our response to this type of conduct by a now convicted murderess is natural. But I wonder if many of us absorb ourselves in high-profile cases and live through them because it is so much more comfortable and safer than to face realities in our own lives that so many of us do not wish to face? It is so much easier, even more fun, to get made at and to disparage Miss Arias for her crime of murder and other misdeeds than to face our own "demons" in our own lives. Every murder and every heinous crime springs from thoughts that, if fed enough, become attitudes that we act on.
What separates murderers from victims? From non-murderers? If we have been following this case, we know that Travis, himself, and his siblings, we know that they endured early childhoods of neglect and deprivation. This was until their parents passed away and their Grandmother took them all in and raised them. Statistics tell us that many people who have endured childhood abuse or deprivation often become abusers or criminals themselves, or become involved in crimes. This clearly did not happen in the case of Travis or his siblings. Travis himself became a murder victim. Yes, people can be both victims and end up being criminals or parties to crimes. This happens in the cases of many abused wives, girlfriends or children who kill their abusers when they feel that they are trapped and that there is no other way out. This happens in cases where people, in their criminal activity, use more vulnerable people as accomplices or accessories (especially in cover ups or co-signings). Was Jodie abused or a victim? From all the evidence that was presented, I do not think so, but instead fits the profile of an abuser long before she murdered Travis. My Christian beliefs, according to the Bible, make it clear that in the eyes of God we are all criminal and capable of the worst of crimes, including murder. Jesus put anger on an equal footing with murder. Who among us has not been unreasonable angry? I know that I'm not immune to unjust anger and I do not believe anyone else is. Why are so many crimes, including murder, committed? We know people kill out of rage, jealousy, and greed. Truth be told, each of us will at some point or other struggle with one or more of these demons (I have!). It is the feeding of these impulses, as Jodie has done, that results in murder or other violent crimes. This same principle runs true in acting, or not acting on, impulses that could result in criminal activity, whether we are talking about murder or other violent crimes or other felonies like fraud, identity theft, embezzlement, larceny and the like. It all starts in the mind and depends on what we feed our minds on and what we expose ourselves to. It depends on what drives us, our impulses and our drives or our minds and hearts.
The trial of Jodie Arias is not over and the family of Travis still need public support and care as they suffer being re-victimized and make great personal sacrifices to travel back and forth from California where they live to Arizona where the trial for their loved one's murderess is being held.
http://www.travisalexanderjustice.com
A new memorial website has been set up for Travis, complete with photos from every stage of his life. There is a Guestbook where you can sign and leave messages of support for the Alexander family.
Tanisha Sorenson
ALS
700 E. Redlands Blvd. STE U304
Redlands, CA
This is the address that has been set up where you can mail the family letters, cards, even donations or other tokens of support. I encourage you to do what you can.
Travis Alexander Legacy Fund
2036 N. Gilbert Rd.
Suite 2-621
Mesa, AZ 85203
This is an another address where you can send cards, letters or donations, or other tokens of support to the family of Travis Alexander.
Banner Courtesy of Barb McNally
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Good Friday and Holy Saturday, What Do These Mean To Us?
Whether you observe the Easter holidays, the Passover holidays or don't observe either, I'm sure that you're aware that many people of faith observe a holiday season known as "Holy Week," which includes Good Friday and climaxes with what is commonly known as Easter. You may know or not know what Good Friday and Holy Saturday are all about the focus on the death of a Person known as Jesus, the Son of God, though you may or may not know what this means.
Why is Good Friday called that, anyway? This is the day that Christian tradition has set aside specifically to focus on the the Person of Christ, God the Son, the second Person of the Holy Trinity and to focus on the events surrounding His death. And His death was by a method called crucifixion. Today, the cross is a lovely symbol for countless churches and is a pretty emblem on countless necklaces and earrings or is often used as a symbol in countless other ways in the arts. Historically, though, crucifixion on a cross was the most horrific, painful, degrading method of execution known to humanity. It was reserved in Bible days for the worst of the worst of criminals and anyone who was executed this way was counted as "cursed."
What does this mean to you? you may well wonder.
First of all, let's get into the most comforting truth that the events surrounding His death show how completely God, because of Jesus, is so able to identify with anything and everything we may have suffered in life. He may not have suffered your specific trial but he has experienced the range of feelings that go with what you may have or are going through. For example, have you been misunderstood? All of us have. Many of us, because of how we are wired, because of our experiences, or because of what we do, are more subject to being misunderstood than others and know all too well the pain of knowing that people don't "get" us. God in Christ knows exactly the feeling of the sting and loneliness of being misunderstood, even by those closest to Him. The Jews of His day expected a Messiah Who would be warlike, pompous, political and to overthrow their oppressors, establishing an earthly kingdom. Generally speaking, most of the Jews didn't "get" Jesus in His day. They didn't, at all, "get" a Person who claimed to be God but who was peaceful, gentle, ordinary-looking, unpretentious and Who stressed that He came not to be served but to serve and to set up His Kingdom, spiritually speaking, in people's lives and hearts. How dare this Jesus claim equality with God the Father? This was why they (with the full co-operation of the Roman authorities of that day) had Him crucified in the first place! And when they saw and participated in all the events leading up to His death, they certainly didn't, at all, "get" a God Who would allow Himself to be arrested like a criminal and then to die the most horrific form of death then known to man, crucifixion. They saw Him hang in between two criminals and remain on that cross until He put Himself into His Father's hands. What kind of a God would do these things? So if you are one who lives with the feeling that people can't or won't "get" you, God, because of Jesus, knows just what that feels like. And then some.
Have you been betrayed by someone you once trusted and invested much in? God in Christ has experienced this fully. One of His disciples, Judas Iscariot, betrayed Him to the authorities who arreested Him and had Him crucified. Judas, like the other 11 disciples, has the wonderful privilege of being physically close to God the Son for several years. He got to interact with Jesus in countless different ways, saw His miracles, His acts of love and compassion for people and the the clearest, most accurate expression of God in human form. Judas must have been initially devoted to and loved Christ or else he would not have followed Him in the first place, leaving his home to follow a man who claimed to be the Messiah and adopt the life of a homeless person. But in the course of time, his experience in being the group's treasurer and his access to the group's funds, tempted him to greed and he eventually succumbed to the love of money. Sadly, greed eroded what faith Judas had and then he betrayed Jesus. And because of Jesus, God can feel the devastation of being "burned" by betrayal.
Human trafficking? We have been becoming more and more aware of the different forms of the way that humans are trafficked, whether into sex slavery, black market adoptions, domestic servitude, bride trafficking and more. Because of Jesus, God knows what it's like to be sold like a commodity. In Christ, He was sold for 30 pieces of silver to the authorities, Unspeakable depravity! So if you are an advocate against human trafficking and are even a survivor, God can, because of Jesus, fully understand you.
Rejected? God in Christ knows all about the awful experience of being rejected. All of us have experienced rejection in some form or other. Some of us have experienced more of rejection than others, because of the people we have dealt with, because of how we are made or because of what we do. Rejection comes in all shapes and sizes but it always hurts. Feeling rejected has motivated countless suicides and crimes and is behind countless forms of addiction and mental health and emotional problems. Jesus was rejected, especially during the final years of His earthy life. The Jewish people shunned Him because He didn't, as I already mentioned, fit their criteria for a Messiah. They were livid that He hung out with and cared for non-Jews (bear in mind that at that time, the Jews were not marginalized like now, but were seen as the superior race), corrupt and immoral people, sick or disabled people, the poor, children, women and others who were counted as "rejects." The events of and surrounding His death, by definition, are the ultimate form of rejection. They wanted to have Him eliminated. Because of Jesus, God knows all about rejection.
Verbally abused? The old saying "Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me" is false. We all know that words can and do hurt and that often, they can scar us for life, emotionally. God in Christ, throughout His last years on Earth as a human, experienced terrible verbal abuse. He was called a "liar," an "evil person," a "glutton," a drunkard," a "foreigner," the "devil," "Satan" and much more. His enemies, the Jewish religious leaders, often said nasty things to him or about Him to others. They lived to make His life hellish. He was cursed, taunted and trashed. So many of us have had things said to us and about us, things that, even when forgiven, can never be forgotten and that will stay with us throughout life. Because of Jesus, God knows what this is like. And more.
Physically abused? Upon his betrayal and arrest, God in Christ was hellishly abused beyond imagination. People spit on Him to show their total contempt for Him. They put a crown of thorns on His head for mockery and to maximize His pain before He even made it to His execution. They hit His back, over and over, with whips. Long before He made it to His cross, He was in excrutiating physical pain, lost much blood and His body was much weakened by all this hellish abuse. He was forced, at least part of the way, to carry His cross. And wood is heavy, as you probably know. And then nails were driven through His hands (or wrists) and feet (or ankles) to make for excruciating physical pain beyond human imagination. He suffered physically in every way and then experienced death, the ultimate in abuse.
Sexually abused? Statistics tell us that countless children, both boys and girls, are sexually abused and often families don't report it or when it is reported, law enforcement haven't been helpful. And there are all the adults that experience sexual abuse. And sexual abuse doesn't include only forcible rape but comes in many different forms. Because of Jesus, God knows what this feels like. He hung on His cross totally naked and in public and was taunted throughout. His dignity was totally stripped from Him during those hours. Because of Jesus, God knows what it is like to be violated and degraded and shamed.
Falsely accused? He Who was totally innocent and without the slightest fault or sin, was accused of the ultiimate evil, that of treason against His people and blasphemy, all because of His claim to be the Messiah and because He didn't fit the people's criteria for what their Messiah should be like. He was treated like the worst of all criminals and was executed in the worst way of that time. Many of us have been falsely accused of things we never did and many have been wrongfully charged, prosecuted, imprisoned and even executed for crimes. Many parents and other caregivers have been falsely accused of abuse and have lost children by court order or have been sent to prison. God in Christ knows fully what it's like to be falsely accused of crimes that He never did.
Lost a child? Because of Jesus, God knows the unimaginable pain and tremendous pain of losing a beloved child. He suffered this loss when His Son was dying on a cross; He can fully identify with all of those among you who have been unfortunate enough to have lost a child.
Do you fear death? God in Christ actually died a real death. But, unlike every other person, He fully pre-meditated, planned and orchestrated His own death down do the smallest detail.one of the events in His life, including those surrounding His death, took Him by surprise. He did it all willingly and on purpose. And why did He do all this? Well, God is infinitely holy, according to the Scriptures. Compared to His holiness, all of us are, in His sight, sinners. He could not just let us off. Someone had to pay our debt. That's where His Earth-visit, in Christ, comes in. So, instead of punishing us and destroying us outright, He, in Christ, came to our Earth at one point in time, was conceived as a fetus, was born a baby, and then lived the perfect human life that we could never live. Then He died in our place to satisfy His own demands of justice so that each of us who wants a relationship with Him, can come to Him by means of Christ.
But this isn't the end! He came back to life. This is what Easter is all about.
If you have a Bible or access to one, you can read about it more:
Matthew 26:47 to Matthew 27:66
Mark 14:43 to Mark 15:47
Luke 22:47 to Luke 23:58
John 18 to John 19:42
Why is Good Friday called that, anyway? This is the day that Christian tradition has set aside specifically to focus on the the Person of Christ, God the Son, the second Person of the Holy Trinity and to focus on the events surrounding His death. And His death was by a method called crucifixion. Today, the cross is a lovely symbol for countless churches and is a pretty emblem on countless necklaces and earrings or is often used as a symbol in countless other ways in the arts. Historically, though, crucifixion on a cross was the most horrific, painful, degrading method of execution known to humanity. It was reserved in Bible days for the worst of the worst of criminals and anyone who was executed this way was counted as "cursed."
What does this mean to you? you may well wonder.
First of all, let's get into the most comforting truth that the events surrounding His death show how completely God, because of Jesus, is so able to identify with anything and everything we may have suffered in life. He may not have suffered your specific trial but he has experienced the range of feelings that go with what you may have or are going through. For example, have you been misunderstood? All of us have. Many of us, because of how we are wired, because of our experiences, or because of what we do, are more subject to being misunderstood than others and know all too well the pain of knowing that people don't "get" us. God in Christ knows exactly the feeling of the sting and loneliness of being misunderstood, even by those closest to Him. The Jews of His day expected a Messiah Who would be warlike, pompous, political and to overthrow their oppressors, establishing an earthly kingdom. Generally speaking, most of the Jews didn't "get" Jesus in His day. They didn't, at all, "get" a Person who claimed to be God but who was peaceful, gentle, ordinary-looking, unpretentious and Who stressed that He came not to be served but to serve and to set up His Kingdom, spiritually speaking, in people's lives and hearts. How dare this Jesus claim equality with God the Father? This was why they (with the full co-operation of the Roman authorities of that day) had Him crucified in the first place! And when they saw and participated in all the events leading up to His death, they certainly didn't, at all, "get" a God Who would allow Himself to be arrested like a criminal and then to die the most horrific form of death then known to man, crucifixion. They saw Him hang in between two criminals and remain on that cross until He put Himself into His Father's hands. What kind of a God would do these things? So if you are one who lives with the feeling that people can't or won't "get" you, God, because of Jesus, knows just what that feels like. And then some.
Have you been betrayed by someone you once trusted and invested much in? God in Christ has experienced this fully. One of His disciples, Judas Iscariot, betrayed Him to the authorities who arreested Him and had Him crucified. Judas, like the other 11 disciples, has the wonderful privilege of being physically close to God the Son for several years. He got to interact with Jesus in countless different ways, saw His miracles, His acts of love and compassion for people and the the clearest, most accurate expression of God in human form. Judas must have been initially devoted to and loved Christ or else he would not have followed Him in the first place, leaving his home to follow a man who claimed to be the Messiah and adopt the life of a homeless person. But in the course of time, his experience in being the group's treasurer and his access to the group's funds, tempted him to greed and he eventually succumbed to the love of money. Sadly, greed eroded what faith Judas had and then he betrayed Jesus. And because of Jesus, God can feel the devastation of being "burned" by betrayal.
Human trafficking? We have been becoming more and more aware of the different forms of the way that humans are trafficked, whether into sex slavery, black market adoptions, domestic servitude, bride trafficking and more. Because of Jesus, God knows what it's like to be sold like a commodity. In Christ, He was sold for 30 pieces of silver to the authorities, Unspeakable depravity! So if you are an advocate against human trafficking and are even a survivor, God can, because of Jesus, fully understand you.
Rejected? God in Christ knows all about the awful experience of being rejected. All of us have experienced rejection in some form or other. Some of us have experienced more of rejection than others, because of the people we have dealt with, because of how we are made or because of what we do. Rejection comes in all shapes and sizes but it always hurts. Feeling rejected has motivated countless suicides and crimes and is behind countless forms of addiction and mental health and emotional problems. Jesus was rejected, especially during the final years of His earthy life. The Jewish people shunned Him because He didn't, as I already mentioned, fit their criteria for a Messiah. They were livid that He hung out with and cared for non-Jews (bear in mind that at that time, the Jews were not marginalized like now, but were seen as the superior race), corrupt and immoral people, sick or disabled people, the poor, children, women and others who were counted as "rejects." The events of and surrounding His death, by definition, are the ultimate form of rejection. They wanted to have Him eliminated. Because of Jesus, God knows all about rejection.
Verbally abused? The old saying "Sticks and stones can break my bones but words can never hurt me" is false. We all know that words can and do hurt and that often, they can scar us for life, emotionally. God in Christ, throughout His last years on Earth as a human, experienced terrible verbal abuse. He was called a "liar," an "evil person," a "glutton," a drunkard," a "foreigner," the "devil," "Satan" and much more. His enemies, the Jewish religious leaders, often said nasty things to him or about Him to others. They lived to make His life hellish. He was cursed, taunted and trashed. So many of us have had things said to us and about us, things that, even when forgiven, can never be forgotten and that will stay with us throughout life. Because of Jesus, God knows what this is like. And more.
Physically abused? Upon his betrayal and arrest, God in Christ was hellishly abused beyond imagination. People spit on Him to show their total contempt for Him. They put a crown of thorns on His head for mockery and to maximize His pain before He even made it to His execution. They hit His back, over and over, with whips. Long before He made it to His cross, He was in excrutiating physical pain, lost much blood and His body was much weakened by all this hellish abuse. He was forced, at least part of the way, to carry His cross. And wood is heavy, as you probably know. And then nails were driven through His hands (or wrists) and feet (or ankles) to make for excruciating physical pain beyond human imagination. He suffered physically in every way and then experienced death, the ultimate in abuse.
Sexually abused? Statistics tell us that countless children, both boys and girls, are sexually abused and often families don't report it or when it is reported, law enforcement haven't been helpful. And there are all the adults that experience sexual abuse. And sexual abuse doesn't include only forcible rape but comes in many different forms. Because of Jesus, God knows what this feels like. He hung on His cross totally naked and in public and was taunted throughout. His dignity was totally stripped from Him during those hours. Because of Jesus, God knows what it is like to be violated and degraded and shamed.
Falsely accused? He Who was totally innocent and without the slightest fault or sin, was accused of the ultiimate evil, that of treason against His people and blasphemy, all because of His claim to be the Messiah and because He didn't fit the people's criteria for what their Messiah should be like. He was treated like the worst of all criminals and was executed in the worst way of that time. Many of us have been falsely accused of things we never did and many have been wrongfully charged, prosecuted, imprisoned and even executed for crimes. Many parents and other caregivers have been falsely accused of abuse and have lost children by court order or have been sent to prison. God in Christ knows fully what it's like to be falsely accused of crimes that He never did.
Lost a child? Because of Jesus, God knows the unimaginable pain and tremendous pain of losing a beloved child. He suffered this loss when His Son was dying on a cross; He can fully identify with all of those among you who have been unfortunate enough to have lost a child.
Do you fear death? God in Christ actually died a real death. But, unlike every other person, He fully pre-meditated, planned and orchestrated His own death down do the smallest detail.one of the events in His life, including those surrounding His death, took Him by surprise. He did it all willingly and on purpose. And why did He do all this? Well, God is infinitely holy, according to the Scriptures. Compared to His holiness, all of us are, in His sight, sinners. He could not just let us off. Someone had to pay our debt. That's where His Earth-visit, in Christ, comes in. So, instead of punishing us and destroying us outright, He, in Christ, came to our Earth at one point in time, was conceived as a fetus, was born a baby, and then lived the perfect human life that we could never live. Then He died in our place to satisfy His own demands of justice so that each of us who wants a relationship with Him, can come to Him by means of Christ.
But this isn't the end! He came back to life. This is what Easter is all about.
If you have a Bible or access to one, you can read about it more:
Matthew 26:47 to Matthew 27:66
Mark 14:43 to Mark 15:47
Luke 22:47 to Luke 23:58
John 18 to John 19:42
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
Motives for Killing and Bullying
A few days ago in the US and in Cleveland, Ohio, a student brought a gun and shot a number of other students. His act injured a couple of students enought to cause them to be hospitalized. And three other students lost their lives, one succumbing to his injuries and being declared "brain dead" when he reached the hospital. The suspect, a thin, sad-looking young man, did not seem to anyone who knew him, to be "the type of person who would do a thing like that." People who knew this young man described him as a "quiet guy," a "loner who kept to himself" and that he "always had a sad look in his eyes." He had been attending an "alternative school" for "at-risk" youth. He had been living with his grandparents. What is the suggested motive for this suspect's murder? It was suggested that he was a bullied outcast who had "snapped" and let his pent-up anger and hurt at his past boil over, spilling over onto innocent students who had nothing to do with his original pain.
This sound like another, even more far-reaching mass murder that took place in April 1999, at Littleton, Colorado at Columbine High School. Two deeply troubled youth brought guns and pipe bombs into their school, to carry out a crime that they had planned a year in advance. They had intended to kill many students; however, one teacher and 12 students actually lost their lives. Then the two gunmen ended their own lives. What was the motive for this horrific murder-suicide? The two deeply troubled young men had been outcasts who had been bullied by classmates and theit pent-up hurts and anger spilled over and causes them to "snap" and "more than level the playing field" by becoming the bullies who also "checked out." Sadly, this is not the only such story. Months ago, I pulled up a link on Facebook and read a sad article about a boy who was on trial for the crime of raping his younger sister. What was the motive for this crime? Again, the defense was that this boy had been bullied at school and he finally "snapped" by taking out his anger and hurts on his younger sister, raping her. And weeks ago, I viewed a few episodes in a series that was designed to raise awareness about stalking. In the episode in question, the stalker was a young man and his victim was a girl who befriended him because she felt sorry for the way that other students bullied him. Their friendship started as a true friendship but something happenened one day that ended this all abruptly. He had tried to get this girl's attention that day or something; when he could not get that attention, he demanded, "So you think you are too good to speak to me now?" Then he began to stalk her and threaten her; fearing for her life, the girl avoided him. He grew worse until she reported him to authorities where he was arrested, tried and imprisoned. The motive for this young man's crime was clearly rage over an unresolved past of anger and hurt over years of being excluded and bullied by his peers. He was "getting even" by becoming the bully, the stalker. There have been quite a few other crimes that have been committed, especially in schools and in workplaces, that have had as their stated motive unresolved hurt and anger over pasts of being excluded and bullied.
I'm not condoning these young people's crimes or excusing them for what they did. Being bullied and excluded, even repeatedly and without adult involvement, no more justifies crime any more than any other adversity would. The point? Over and over, we should by now see, by the bullycides and bullying-motivated homicides, that bullying affects young people and affects their emotional development more than we have realized. And yet bullying shows no signs of going away, whether in schools or in the community, among children or among adults. We can be thankful for all the resources and awareness that are being poured into the prevention and ending of bullying. Because of all this advocacy, bullying is no longer seen as a "rite of passage" and victims are seen and treated with empathy rather than blame. And yet bullying is getting worse as well as how young people react to it so often, by bullycide or by bullying-motivated crimes. What explains this? It's the fact that respect for life, from conception to death, has declined dramatically, as the young are often not learning good morals, empathy or self-control. It's harder to pass traditional values of morality, empathy, self-control, compassion, conviction and respect for life to the next generation.
When I was growing up, I indeed endure much bullying and terrible teasing and the focus was on what I was doing to "bring on the bullying" and I did not see that my bullies experienced consequences or that I was taken seriously. Much of this bullying was done to me because of my differences that I'm certain would have gotten me an autism spectrum diagnosis via today's current DSM-5, had I grown up during these times. It was awful and scarring and the effects of growing up with unexplained differences and then being bullied by peers and widely misunderstood by adults, remains with me to this day. Yet because respect for life, moral values, empathy and self-control had been instilled in me and just a couple of years in a church-based school where God was central in the curriculum, had a big effect on me, ultimately. Faith-based values give hope in bad times; today, our culture does not help us instill such values in the young that would give them what they need to survive and so we keep hearing about more and more crimes being committed by young people, and more youth suicide. We can blame much of that on the fact that God has been driven out of so many of or schools and out of the public square. I have observed in so many of these bullying-motivated crimes and bullycides that the young people in question seemed to have little spiritual foundation. Or if they did, it was not passed on to them, as the values of love, compassion, empathy, self-control, hope and faith in God start first in the home.
These bullying-motivated crimes seem to be the saddest of all as they could have been prevented in the first place. Was the prior bullying that motivated these young people's crimes taken seriously? I doubt it. I know that educators, especially teachers, have hard jobs and that it is probably easier to ignore bullying or not take it seriously. We parents find it easier to ignore bullying, not only denying that our young are being bullied but that they can be the bullies. As for bad parents who neglect or abuse they young, they are not only hurting their children but they are also hurting society by inflicting on the rest of us young people who will likely bully our children and, if not helped, will "graduate to adult lives of crime. This is just one more reason to prevent and end child abuse.
Now there is one young person who, because he "snapped" because of a painful past, which also included a bad home life, will probably spend the rest of his life in prison and will be hated and feared by society. The lives of those three families who have to bury beloved children, the students who are injured and their loved ones, will never be the same. And the lives of the suspect's family will never be the same. They are no doubt devastated and shocked and had no idea that their loved one would do such a thing. The boy who raped his younger sister will also probably spend the rest of his life in prison and likewise be hated by society; his family are no doubt in incredible emotional pain. I don't need to go into all the lives that were destroyed as a result of the mass murder-suicide at Columbine High School or other school or workplace shootings. Shouldn't all these cimes, so often motivated by pasts of bullying and exclusion, not to mention all the bullycides of young people, convince us that bullying can kill or scar one for life?
And where do these young people gain access to guns or other weapons of destruction? This is almost never talked about but it should be, as these weapons are used in the act of murder. Don't adults in the home have a responsibility to deny youth all access to guns or other weapons that can kill? Does anyone but me see the obvious, that these school shootings and other crimes by teens and children, would have been prevented if they had had no access to the weapons that they managed to access? This inceasing availability of guns and other killing weapons may be just an aggravating factor in these crime, but it is an important one.
We can conduct all the bullying awareness projects and campaigns we want, but unless hearts are changed and values are instilled in the young that will result in empathy, respect for all life, compassion, faith in God, self-control, and conviction, these efforts will have limited impact. I would like to see less focus in schools on the "higher math" and other subjects that students will probably never use; I would like to see these repaced by classes in anger management and classes teaching kindness, social skills and assertiveness. We parents need to both model and teach the next generation the values of respect for all life, integrity, empathy, compassion and faith in God.
http://www.stopbullying.gov/
This is a government-sponsored website to educate the public about how to prevent and end bullying.
http://www.stompoutbullying.org/
This website is for a nonprofit organization that provides comprehensive services to prevent and end bullying, including a hotline for bully victims. Whenever I visit this site, I think: How I could have used such services growing up!
http://peerabuse.net/
This is one website that is devoted to those among us whose bullying was bad enough to leave lifelong scars.
http://bullyinglte.wordpress.com/
This website is a forum for those who want to share their bullying stories to prevent and end bullying and to heal themselves and "let go."
This sound like another, even more far-reaching mass murder that took place in April 1999, at Littleton, Colorado at Columbine High School. Two deeply troubled youth brought guns and pipe bombs into their school, to carry out a crime that they had planned a year in advance. They had intended to kill many students; however, one teacher and 12 students actually lost their lives. Then the two gunmen ended their own lives. What was the motive for this horrific murder-suicide? The two deeply troubled young men had been outcasts who had been bullied by classmates and theit pent-up hurts and anger spilled over and causes them to "snap" and "more than level the playing field" by becoming the bullies who also "checked out." Sadly, this is not the only such story. Months ago, I pulled up a link on Facebook and read a sad article about a boy who was on trial for the crime of raping his younger sister. What was the motive for this crime? Again, the defense was that this boy had been bullied at school and he finally "snapped" by taking out his anger and hurts on his younger sister, raping her. And weeks ago, I viewed a few episodes in a series that was designed to raise awareness about stalking. In the episode in question, the stalker was a young man and his victim was a girl who befriended him because she felt sorry for the way that other students bullied him. Their friendship started as a true friendship but something happenened one day that ended this all abruptly. He had tried to get this girl's attention that day or something; when he could not get that attention, he demanded, "So you think you are too good to speak to me now?" Then he began to stalk her and threaten her; fearing for her life, the girl avoided him. He grew worse until she reported him to authorities where he was arrested, tried and imprisoned. The motive for this young man's crime was clearly rage over an unresolved past of anger and hurt over years of being excluded and bullied by his peers. He was "getting even" by becoming the bully, the stalker. There have been quite a few other crimes that have been committed, especially in schools and in workplaces, that have had as their stated motive unresolved hurt and anger over pasts of being excluded and bullied.
I'm not condoning these young people's crimes or excusing them for what they did. Being bullied and excluded, even repeatedly and without adult involvement, no more justifies crime any more than any other adversity would. The point? Over and over, we should by now see, by the bullycides and bullying-motivated homicides, that bullying affects young people and affects their emotional development more than we have realized. And yet bullying shows no signs of going away, whether in schools or in the community, among children or among adults. We can be thankful for all the resources and awareness that are being poured into the prevention and ending of bullying. Because of all this advocacy, bullying is no longer seen as a "rite of passage" and victims are seen and treated with empathy rather than blame. And yet bullying is getting worse as well as how young people react to it so often, by bullycide or by bullying-motivated crimes. What explains this? It's the fact that respect for life, from conception to death, has declined dramatically, as the young are often not learning good morals, empathy or self-control. It's harder to pass traditional values of morality, empathy, self-control, compassion, conviction and respect for life to the next generation.
When I was growing up, I indeed endure much bullying and terrible teasing and the focus was on what I was doing to "bring on the bullying" and I did not see that my bullies experienced consequences or that I was taken seriously. Much of this bullying was done to me because of my differences that I'm certain would have gotten me an autism spectrum diagnosis via today's current DSM-5, had I grown up during these times. It was awful and scarring and the effects of growing up with unexplained differences and then being bullied by peers and widely misunderstood by adults, remains with me to this day. Yet because respect for life, moral values, empathy and self-control had been instilled in me and just a couple of years in a church-based school where God was central in the curriculum, had a big effect on me, ultimately. Faith-based values give hope in bad times; today, our culture does not help us instill such values in the young that would give them what they need to survive and so we keep hearing about more and more crimes being committed by young people, and more youth suicide. We can blame much of that on the fact that God has been driven out of so many of or schools and out of the public square. I have observed in so many of these bullying-motivated crimes and bullycides that the young people in question seemed to have little spiritual foundation. Or if they did, it was not passed on to them, as the values of love, compassion, empathy, self-control, hope and faith in God start first in the home.
These bullying-motivated crimes seem to be the saddest of all as they could have been prevented in the first place. Was the prior bullying that motivated these young people's crimes taken seriously? I doubt it. I know that educators, especially teachers, have hard jobs and that it is probably easier to ignore bullying or not take it seriously. We parents find it easier to ignore bullying, not only denying that our young are being bullied but that they can be the bullies. As for bad parents who neglect or abuse they young, they are not only hurting their children but they are also hurting society by inflicting on the rest of us young people who will likely bully our children and, if not helped, will "graduate to adult lives of crime. This is just one more reason to prevent and end child abuse.
Now there is one young person who, because he "snapped" because of a painful past, which also included a bad home life, will probably spend the rest of his life in prison and will be hated and feared by society. The lives of those three families who have to bury beloved children, the students who are injured and their loved ones, will never be the same. And the lives of the suspect's family will never be the same. They are no doubt devastated and shocked and had no idea that their loved one would do such a thing. The boy who raped his younger sister will also probably spend the rest of his life in prison and likewise be hated by society; his family are no doubt in incredible emotional pain. I don't need to go into all the lives that were destroyed as a result of the mass murder-suicide at Columbine High School or other school or workplace shootings. Shouldn't all these cimes, so often motivated by pasts of bullying and exclusion, not to mention all the bullycides of young people, convince us that bullying can kill or scar one for life?
And where do these young people gain access to guns or other weapons of destruction? This is almost never talked about but it should be, as these weapons are used in the act of murder. Don't adults in the home have a responsibility to deny youth all access to guns or other weapons that can kill? Does anyone but me see the obvious, that these school shootings and other crimes by teens and children, would have been prevented if they had had no access to the weapons that they managed to access? This inceasing availability of guns and other killing weapons may be just an aggravating factor in these crime, but it is an important one.
We can conduct all the bullying awareness projects and campaigns we want, but unless hearts are changed and values are instilled in the young that will result in empathy, respect for all life, compassion, faith in God, self-control, and conviction, these efforts will have limited impact. I would like to see less focus in schools on the "higher math" and other subjects that students will probably never use; I would like to see these repaced by classes in anger management and classes teaching kindness, social skills and assertiveness. We parents need to both model and teach the next generation the values of respect for all life, integrity, empathy, compassion and faith in God.
http://www.stopbullying.gov/
This is a government-sponsored website to educate the public about how to prevent and end bullying.
http://www.stompoutbullying.org/
This website is for a nonprofit organization that provides comprehensive services to prevent and end bullying, including a hotline for bully victims. Whenever I visit this site, I think: How I could have used such services growing up!
http://peerabuse.net/
This is one website that is devoted to those among us whose bullying was bad enough to leave lifelong scars.
http://bullyinglte.wordpress.com/
This website is a forum for those who want to share their bullying stories to prevent and end bullying and to heal themselves and "let go."
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